Women

[pushpinpussy]

She wanted a puppy. But I didn't want a puppy. So we compromised and got a puppy

[conyoviejo]

Could have been worse,she might have wanted a Pussy..

[Quicknick]

Cook it.

[MACCA]

She wanted a puppy. But I didn't want a puppy. So we compromised and got a puppy

I've managed to avoid this for 5 years, I had to give in to a cat and a rabbit outdoors for now.

I don't mind animals, I just find every time I go into a house where a dog is around, the house either smells, there's hairs everywhere, the garden/patio stinks of p1ss, or usually the dog barks, dribbles or licks you, or a multiple of the above.
I don't want my house to be one of those homes where people feel uncomfortable due to the aforementioned things.

I think once the kids get older, I'm going to have to give in, but I really don't want too, why do people want a dog in their house?

[john'sroseyspecs]

They dont nag or make you decorate ?

[MACCA]

They dont nag or make you decorate ?

Why do women want a dog then?
I get single people who need a companion, and probably stink anyway, but people who have a marriage, kids and a nice home, why do they need a dog?

[john'sroseyspecs]

Baby replacement. They want something small and cute again. Just go with it. Get Fabreeze !

[MACCA]

I'm going to put it off for as long a possible, every month without a dog is a bonus in my eyes.

I may be able to do what no man has ever done before and actually avoid such nonsense, and don't give in.

[PLTMGMBJ]

KY Jelly, a splint and wire ties....sorted!

[AlargeClaret]

Never get why birds are obsessed with “ getting a dog” downsides are your house will stink a bit and half your life will be spent picking up steaming turds .I guess if you do buckle and accede to her demands at least get a proper dog and not one of those god awful handbag dogs theyrelittle more than yappy turd machines .

[PLTMGMBJ]

Never get why birds are obsessed with “ getting a dog” downsides are your house will stink a bit and half your life will be spent picking up steaming turds .I guess if you do buckle and accede to her demands at least get a proper dog and not one of those god awful handbag dogs theyrelittle more than yappy turd machines .

Or, obviously. She could just find a better man than you?!

[tim_noone]

Why do women want a dog then?
I get single people who need a companion, and probably stink anyway, but people who have a marriage, kids and a nice home, why do they need a dog?

so you used to stink?

[cricketfieldclarets]

Why anyone would want to pick up dogshit in a plastic bag is beyond me.

[ClaretAndJew]

I use my dog's turds as entrees for my evening meal.

[cricketfieldclarets]

I use my dog's turds as entrees for my evening meal.

Im sure some do they pick it up. Then touch the lead, their phone... there whatever before having washed their hands. Then go home and eat dinner.

Dirty bastards.

[cricketfieldclarets]

And agree with the poster above. Why do some (most) dog owners assume you love their dog as much as they do.

I dont want your dog licking my face, climbing all over and malting on me and cant be arsed stroking it.

Same goes for them dickheads that bring their baby into an office.

[ClaretAndJew]

And agree with the poster above. Why do some (most) dog owners assume you love their dog as much as they do.

I dont want your dog licking my face, climbing all over and malting on me and cant be arsed stroking it.

Same goes for them dickheads that bring their baby into an office.

Got to agree with the baby thing.

I have no kids, not sure I want them, and... it's just weird how everyone coos over them, here's my child, LOOK AT THE BABY IN THE CARRY COT, LOOK AT IT NOW!!!!

It can't have a conversation and all babies look the same to me, just bald and depressed.

[Bin Ont Turf]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZhfWiU8wGCc" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[ants_g]

Why anyone would want to pick up dogshit in a plastic bag is beyond me.

Because it's better than picking it up without one?

[Bordeauxclaret]

I’m not aware of anyone who’s bought a dog for that specific reason.

[CharlieinNewMexico]

Dogs are a single man's Tinder. Get yourself out walking with a lab or setter and the girls are all over you. Pitbull if you are into tattooed women.

[PLTMGMBJ]

Why anyone would want to pick up dogshit in a plastic bag is beyond me.

The alternative is not picking it up and some poor unsuspecting individual stepping in it. I had some moron near me say 'You're giving people like me a bad name' by which he meant I picked up and he didn't. I simply turned to him and said. 'If I catch you not picking up after your dog, I'll bounce you around town like a ball'.

PICK UP YOUR DOGS CRAP!

[LeuvenClaret]

Remember - A puppy is for life not for women.

[gawthorpe_view]

Ultraviolet light reflecting off a long white dress can trigger a chemical imbalance in a woman's brain.
The resulting conditions are complicated and unpredictable.

[basil6345789]

Having a woman is better than having a dog as they can cook and last longer.

[Tribesmen]

The Wife wanted two dogs a few years ago , well sure was my answer , But you have to buy their dog food , take them for walks every night , and when you are away with work you have to take them to kennels until you get back .
I want totally nothing to do with them what's so ever .

Guess what we never did get the dogs in the end .

[Bertiebeehead]

There’s already one big hairy eating crapping machine in my house, that’s quite enough.

[Chobulous]

Speaking of which, we have a springer spaniel. When my wife first suggested we should get him I was against it. When she asked why my answer was that spaniels were smelly, always breaking wind and left their hair all over the place. Her response was "That just describes you Peter".
We've had him now for 14 years.

[Mattster]

I've played the long game, hoping it works out.

Wife (then girlfriend) wanted a rabbit, I said I don't want pets (why anyone would want to pay money to give themselves extra chores is completely beyond me). She ended up getting multiple outdoor rabbits and I said that's fine but I'm having nothing to do with them, especially cleaning them out. It's ended up that basically it's me who feeds them every night but I've held firm on the cleaning bit which she does.

The long game angle as I see it is once these rabbits kick the bucket I have all the ammo I need to win any eventual argument about future pets.

[iluva64]

She'll loose interest quite soon.

then Man's Best Friend becomes his Dog...........they are a great babe magnet, even better is find a local that allows dogs in, then you just have an excuse to go to the pub. And best of all they don't answer back or have an opinion

[Steve1956]

I've managed to avoid this for 5 years, I had to give in to a cat and a rabbit outdoors for now.

I don't mind animals, I just find every time I go into a house where a dog is around, the house either smells, there's hairs everywhere, the garden/patio stinks of p1ss, or usually the dog barks, dribbles or licks you, or a multiple of the above.
I don't want my house to be one of those homes where people feel uncomfortable due to the aforementioned things.

I think once the kids get older, I'm going to have to give in, but I really don't want too, why do people want a dog in their house?

You miserable tw@t!

[clive40golf]

Best thing to do is do what I did. Pretend that you are allergic to them. Just a quick cough sneeze and a rub of the eyes and there you go.


Works for horses as well

[bfcjg]

What annoys me is when your out with the children/grandchildren etc a dog runs up and the person always says don't worry it wont bite. Take its teeth out then.

[tim_noone]

Best thing to do is do what I did. Pretend that you are allergic to them. Just a quick cough sneeze and a rub of the eyes and there you go.


Works for horses as well

Not in Blackburn

[KateR]

we ended up buying a dog quite a while back, basically as some say it was for our youngest as he was last at home as the others left, I gave a small list of must have's, no shedding hair, good with kids, not needing lots of exercise, he gave his, no small dogs or he wouldn't walk it, our son did not get much say beyond a dog! He trolled through numerous sites with multiple inputs to find the best dog, 9 out of 10 sites said standard poodle, we ended up getting one, I insisted on a kennel and being outside evenings. The kennel thing lasted about a month and then we he went on business the dog was allowed in and stayed for the rest of his life, a beautiful intelligent loyal dog sadly missed by the whole family.

He wants another but have told him no not until you retire and stop travelling, in many ways worse than having a baby, every time you want to go away, for a day/weekend/week it's all about arranging where the dog will be, night's out when it got late was all about I hope the dog's ok when our youngest was older and not around.

He was a big dog, bigger than any lab we saw, don't need much exercise like a lab, don't shed any hair, cost of grooming high though, if we ever get another dog it will be another standard poodle, black only It seems that different colored poodles have different temperaments, black being the easiest going, who knew! Oh and one other downside, they cost a lot to buy!!

[Steve1956]

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My house dosent stink and I wouldn't be without out these two beauties get a dog you miserable tw@t.

[MACCA]

Those who say their house or dogs don't smell, have gone nose blind.

And don't get me started on all the shite on the pavements and in the parks, it's disgusting.
I know not all owners are unthoughful, but even the better owners can't clean up doggy runs.... it's just smeared all over the pavement or grass.


It's like none smokers, you can often smell a smoker just by walking past them. Their clothes, hair, fingers and breath stink. The smoker thinks that the choddy they had after their fag has got rid if the rancid smell, however sadly it doesn't.