1st world problems thread

ŽižkovClaret · Post by **ŽižkovClaret** » Thu May 24, 2018 7:19 pm

My landlord hasn't filled the rooftop pool up yet

dpinsussex · Post by **dpinsussex** » Thu May 24, 2018 7:32 pm

My broadband isn't fast enough

Rowls · Post by **Rowls** » Thu May 24, 2018 7:32 pm

My microwave beep incessantly when its finished. It's annoying as heck.

dpinsussex · Post by **dpinsussex** » Thu May 24, 2018 7:33 pm

My wife has an opinion

KRBFC · Post by **KRBFC** » Thu May 24, 2018 7:38 pm

Liverpool fans had flights cancelled today for Saturday's Champions League final

rufus lumley · Post by **rufus lumley** » Thu May 24, 2018 7:47 pm

Tesco are reducing the clubcard boost rewards from triple to double.

LeadBelly · Post by **LeadBelly** » Thu May 24, 2018 7:54 pm

The Dom Perignon '96 I'm sipping is half a degree too warm.

Archie Claret · Post by **Archie Claret** » Thu May 24, 2018 7:58 pm

My magnum of Rose won't fit in the fridge!

gawthorpe_view · Post by **gawthorpe_view** » Thu May 24, 2018 10:01 pm

We only finished 7th in the Premier League last season.

cricketfieldclarets · Post by **cricketfieldclarets** » Thu May 24, 2018 10:48 pm

I have 3 garages and 4 car parking spaces but only 6 cars

ClaretAndJew · Post by **ClaretAndJew** » Thu May 24, 2018 10:49 pm

I only have a 9 inch penis

Buxtonclaret · Post by **Buxtonclaret** » Thu May 24, 2018 11:25 pm

They think I don't know.
Crap. Be always known.

The light in my fridge always goes off when the doors closed.

Bfcboyo · Post by **Bfcboyo** » Thu May 24, 2018 11:46 pm

See cricket field stand thread.

tybfc · Post by **tybfc** » Fri May 25, 2018 12:35 am

Buxtonclaret wrote:They think I don't know.
Crap. Be always known.

The light in my fridge always goes off when the doors closed.

How do you know?

1fatclaret · Post by **1fatclaret** » Fri May 25, 2018 5:04 am

I am desperate for a new watch, but agonisingly, I only have £3999 to spend....

claretinkorea · Post by **claretinkorea** » Fri May 25, 2018 5:38 am

I can't get to my second fridge because of all the junk in my shed!

Burnley Ace · Post by **Burnley Ace** » Fri May 25, 2018 6:54 am

Archie Claret wrote:My magnum of Rose won't fit in the fridge!

You only have a magnum, your fridge is too small, or both?

Imploding Turtle · Post by **Imploding Turtle** » Fri May 25, 2018 7:08 am

tybfc wrote:How do you know?

Video camera on phone, phone into fridge.

Shore claret · Post by **Shore claret** » Fri May 25, 2018 7:50 am

The modern cricketer is an untrustworthy rascal.

Chobulous · Post by **Chobulous** » Fri May 25, 2018 8:01 am

Emily Thornberry has just got a new neighbour. He arrived in a white van and immediately put an England flag in his front window. There goes the neighbourhood.
Jeremy Corbyn is mobilising his IRA chums. (Islington Residents Association)

IndigoLake · Post by **IndigoLake** » Fri May 25, 2018 8:03 am

When you've just sat down on the sofa and realise you left the TV remote beyond a reasonable reaching distance.

Lord Beamish · Post by **Lord Beamish** » Fri May 25, 2018 9:14 am

It turns out that loads of our Cultural Heroes of the past turned out to be inveterate Sexual Predators.

Hipper · Post by **Hipper** » Fri May 25, 2018 9:16 am

I'm so bored I'm reading this.

ClaretinMyBlood · Post by **ClaretinMyBlood** » Fri May 25, 2018 10:13 am

Queuing up in Aldi with one or two items in your hand and the person in front with a converyor belt full of shopping doesn't say, go on mate you can go in front...

Diesel · Post by **Diesel** » Fri May 25, 2018 10:22 am

ClaretinMyBlood wrote:Queuing up in Aldi with one or two items in your hand and the person in front with a converyor belt full of shopping doesn't say, go on mate you can go in front...

Chances are they can't speak English.

ClaretinMyBlood · Post by **ClaretinMyBlood** » Fri May 25, 2018 10:24 am

Diesel wrote:Chances are they can't speak English.

True, especially that Aldi near Burnley Wood

Chobulous · Post by **Chobulous** » Fri May 25, 2018 10:40 am

ClaretinMyBlood wrote:Queuing up in Aldi with one or two items in your hand and the person in front with a converyor belt full of shopping doesn't say, go on mate you can go in front...

That's what queues are for. You wait your turn.

Diesel · Post by **Diesel** » Fri May 25, 2018 10:40 am

ClaretinMyBlood wrote:True, especially that Aldi near Burnley Wood

Lidl at Duke Bar is like attending the Eurovision song contest in a supermarket but without any music.

ClaretinMyBlood · Post by **ClaretinMyBlood** » Fri May 25, 2018 10:41 am

Chobulous wrote:That's what queues are for. You wait your turn.

Wrong thread mate, that's a 2nd world problem.

starting_11 · Post by **starting_11** » Fri May 25, 2018 10:50 am

ClaretinMyBlood wrote:Queuing up in Aldi with one or two items in your hand and the person in front with a converyor belt full of shopping doesn't say, go on mate you can go in front...

Queuing up at the supermarket with a trolly full of shopping behind some wally with one or two items that doesn't go to the self service...

ClaretinMyBlood · Post by **ClaretinMyBlood** » Fri May 25, 2018 10:52 am

starting_11 wrote:Queuing up at the supermarket with a trolly full of shopping behind some wally with one or two items that doesn't go to the self service...

Self service in Aldi?
Lol
What planet are you from?

houseboy · Post by **houseboy** » Fri May 25, 2018 11:11 am

Self service tills? Why don't they open up more normal tills and employ young offenders at 10p an hour? They could learn a new language at the same time.

HiroshimaClaret · Post by **HiroshimaClaret** » Fri May 25, 2018 11:13 am

ClaretAndJew wrote:I only have a 9 inch penis

I`m not sure being a pathological liar counts as a `First World Problem`.

ClaretAndJew · Post by **ClaretAndJew** » Fri May 25, 2018 11:19 am

HiroshimaClaret wrote:I`m not sure being a pathological liar counts as a `First World Problem`.

Alright, it's a foot long.

starting_11 · Post by **starting_11** » Fri May 25, 2018 11:20 am

ClaretAndJew wrote:Alright, it's a foot long.

Set himself up for that one didnt he!

Marney&Mee · Post by **Marney&Mee** » Fri May 25, 2018 12:37 pm

Not knowing whether to let the club know about the 7 under 10 seats I have together in Jimmy Mac upper.

I don't even have any kids...

Lauren12 · Post by **Lauren12** » Fri May 25, 2018 1:05 pm

Cant decide whether to have char grilled chicken, pan fried sea bass or braised lamb for dinner tonight. I know what I'll do, I'll let the servant whose preparing my dinner decide, that'll keep 'em happy.

Foshiznik · Post by **Foshiznik** » Fri May 25, 2018 1:07 pm

ClaretinMyBlood wrote:Self service in Aldi?
Lol
What planet are you from?

My local Lidl has self service checkouts too.

Then again, I only mingle with the very affluent members of society.

bfcjg · Post by **bfcjg** » Fri May 25, 2018 1:09 pm

My ultra HD went on the blink last night had to make do with HD.

Lauren12 · Post by **Lauren12** » Fri May 25, 2018 1:14 pm

and if the club haven't released details of the new 2018/ 19 season home kit before I set off on my 3 week cruise around the Mediterranean, I'm gonna have a BREAK DOWN.

Hopey · Post by **Hopey** » Fri May 25, 2018 1:26 pm

I've released an iPhone app for LHCC and its not out until next Friday.

Buxtonclaret · Post by **Buxtonclaret** » Fri May 25, 2018 4:44 pm

tybfc wrote:How do you know?

I've friends in occasionally dark places.

BennyD · Post by **BennyD** » Fri May 25, 2018 6:54 pm

cricketfieldclarets wrote:I have 3 garages and 4 car parking spaces but only 6 cars

Only 6? Tragic.

Vegas Claret · Post by **Vegas Claret** » Fri May 25, 2018 6:58 pm

I've only got one scoop of ice cream left

tim_noone · Post by **tim_noone** » Fri May 25, 2018 7:26 pm

ClaretinMyBlood wrote:Wrong thread mate, that's a 2nd world problem.