O/T I need decking

[karatekid]

My current patio is too small so I want to replace it with decking. Around 22 m2 approximately. Handrails and lights with a small drop down to a lower level.
Can anyone recommend a good chap for the job?

[Imploding Turtle]

[DustyBawls]

People who incorrectly use sarcasm to reply to sarcasm need locking up for 4 weeks, as a punishment.

[Imploding Turtle]

KarateKid's current patio is too small so I want to replace it with decking. Around 22 m2 approximately. Handrails and lights with a small drop down to a lower level.
Can anyone recommend a good chap for the job?

[DustyBawls]

The joke was "look at this idiot only reading the title".

I think people who don't understand someone elses joke and then critique it should be jailed for life.

Life? I thought I was being harsh with 4 weeks. And you can't quote somebody by only reading the title. You ha... actually, forget it. You don't understand sarcasm, so you've no chance with what I was about to post.

[Bosscat]

My current patio is too small so I want to replace it with decking. Around 22 m2 approximately. Handrails and lights with a small drop down to a lower level.
Can anyone recommend a good chap for the job?

Depending on where you are karatekid we have a small local firm near me called "Escape Decking" not sure how far your from me (they are based in Settle Nth Yorks)

[Bosscat]

Life? I thought I was being harsh with 4 weeks. And you can't quote somebody by only reading the title. You ha... actually, forget it. You don't understand sarcasm, so you've no chance with what I was about to post.

Wasting your time Dusty .... IT has had a humour bypass m8

[karatekid]

Cheers Bosscat but i'm in the Burnley area. Probably too far away.

[Imploding Turtle]

KarateKid's current patio is too small so I want to replace it with decking. Around 22 m2 approximately. Handrails and lights with a small drop down to a lower level.
Can anyone recommend a good chap for the job?

[DustyBawls]

Wasting your time Dusty .... IT has had a humour bypass m8

You can always measure somebody's intelligence by how they treat sarcasm. If somebody doesn't understand it, they will reply with sarcasm - which kills the joke. Unless your sarcasm is actually carrying the joke on, making other people try and understand that sarcasm. Perhaps a pet hate of mine.

[karatekid]

I do hope this thread doesn't get hijacked.

[Imploding Turtle]

I do hope this thread doesn't get hijacked.

Sorry. I just tried to make a dumb joke based on your choice of title, which i'm sure was deliberate.

[pureclaret]

Do it your self, it would be cheaper and also more fulfilling.
I did my own raised decking at 1.5m off the ground at the back of my home its dimensions are 8m x 2.5 m with steps going down to the garden I also did a 4mx3m sitting area thats from .2m to 1.5 off the ground. with railings etc cost for the decking boards posts and railings was £1700 screws bolts etc was about £100 all from Empress fencing Clitheroe.
It took me about 5 weeks to do as I was only able to work at weekends and halfdays. But when Id asked for quotes labour/ fitting was about £2,000
I have also done a couple of others for my children and process was the same even if not at same hights.

[Bosscat]

I do hope this thread doesn't get hijacked.

At least IT can't bring "Brexit" into a decking thread ....



OR CAN HE

[pureclaret]

Just been in touch with empress fencing who said orders paced before the 29th March 2019 guaranteed price

[DustyBawls]

Just been in touch with empress fencing who said orders paced before the 29th March 2019 guaranteed price

fencing.jpg (139.4 KiB) Viewed 1677 times

[Bosscat]

fencing.jpg

You been on "the Piste" again Dusty

[Tricky Trevor]

I need decking is an old gag. If you can’t just smile at post 2 it's you who needs help.

[DustyBawls]

I need decking is an old gag

The OP purposely posted it, knowing that gag. Post 2 is someone thinking the OP didn't mean it. Anybody liking that post thinks the OP did it by accident, so it loses all humour.

[karatekid]

Yeah thread title was deliberate. A sort of click-bait to suit my own purpose of finding a tradesman.

I should have stuck to my original one which was ' I need a man who is good with wood in his hands'.

[Falcon]

Pretty certain both OP and Post 2 are fully aware of the gag and fully aware that one another are fully aware and are both just having some fun with it. Post 3 I'm not sure about - it could be that they are winding up IT or they might actually mean it.

Back to the point at hand, I'm not going to try decking anyone who calls themselves karate kid

[Tricky Trevor]

The OP purposely posted it, knowing that gag. Post 2 is someone thinking the OP didn't mean it. Anybody liking that post thinks the OP did it by accident, so it loses all humour.

All supposition, Dusty. Take it for what it is. I liked it cos it was the first thing that came to mind on seeing the OP.

[DustyBawls]

All supposition, Dusty. Take it for what it is. I liked it cos it was the first thing that came to mind on seeing the OP.

Not at all - the OP has now said it was deliberate. Which was obvious. Yet I seem to be in the minority who knew this.

[beddie]

There will no doubt be plenty of building/gardening firms on the web local to you. Plenty here in Skipton. Ask for references and look at previous work they've done. The catch is maintenance, it looks good for a few years but has to be regularly washed/sealed or it can soon look shabby after a few hard winters. Don't want to put you off but just bear that in mind.

[karatekid]

beddie I'm not too bothered about maintaining it as I suppose it is just part of the job of looking after your property. I just need a good job doing at the installation stage as this will impact on its future look and longevity.

[claretonthecoast1882]

Yeah thread title was deliberate. A sort of click-bait to suit my own purpose of finding a tradesman.

I should have stuck to my original one which was ' I need a man who is good with wood in his hands'.

He would have been first to reply with that title as well, and we all know why

[Bosscat]

Yeah thread title was deliberate. A sort of click-bait to suit my own purpose of finding a tradesman.

I should have stuck to my original one which was ' I need a man who is good with wood in his hands'.

Well you got Turtle in the 1st reply

[Falcon]

Well you got Turtle in the 1st reply

/r/woosh