Anal Fissure

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# 1
Healeywoodclaret
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Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:04 pm

Anyone ever had one? A bit personal I know but the pain associated with anal Fissure is immense. Quite common just wondered if anyone else has suffered with this?

# 2
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:05 pm

The phrases pain in the arse and walking the floors have taken on a whole new meaning.

# 3
taffy
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby taffy » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:10 pm

You need the suppositories with the pain killer in them but you can only get them on prescription, so a trip to the docs I'm afraid

# 4
taffy
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby taffy » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:10 pm

And be prepared for an examination :shock:

# 5
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:14 pm

Already been. Seen Colorectal Team but healing is a slow process 4 to 6 weeks and needs managing carefully whilst healing so it doesn't tear again. GTN paste/ointment to control muscle spasms which cause the pain. Cheers.

# 6
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:15 pm

If not sorted in 8 weeks scope. Oh dear.

# 7
Pearcey
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Pearcey » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:20 pm

I think this is possibly the best thread title I’ve seen! :-D As someone who has suffered with the old Rockfords you have my sympathy. It’s demoralising! Hope the recovery goes well.
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Imploding Turtle
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Imploding Turtle » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:21 pm

Get well soon so that i can make fun of this topic.
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Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:23 pm

Cheers Pearcey. No word of a lie the absolute worst pain I've ever felt. I'm female by the way and gave birth to two children with only gas and air. I feel like I've been in labour for the past two weeks. Walking round the house like a wounded animal! Muscle spasms both. Very painful and very debilitating.

# 10
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:26 pm

Imploding Turtle wrote:Get well soon so that i can make fun of this topic.


Ha ha I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy Turtle not even you!
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# 11
taffy
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby taffy » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:26 pm

If it persists you could end up by having an anal stretch ( yes it is as painful as it sounds) so be careful

# 12
Pearcey
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Pearcey » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:28 pm

Sounds a nightmare. Keep your head up if you can. You’ll be Dyche fit before you know it.

# 13
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:29 pm

Apparently GTN works for 70% of fissures but like I said needs careful management. Surgery involves cutting into the sphincter muscle to alleviate spasms but as for the fissure itself that has to heal on it's own. Hello Fybogel!

# 14
kaptin1
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby kaptin1 » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:32 pm

Healeywoodclaret wrote:Ha ha I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy Turtle not even you!

enemy or emema?
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# 15
evensteadiereddie
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby evensteadiereddie » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:33 pm

I thought it was a misspelling of a player we were after.
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Blackrod
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Blackrod » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:38 pm

Opening this thread has just put me off my lunch.

# 17
evensteadiereddie
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby evensteadiereddie » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:41 pm

I hope your doc gets to the bottom of the problem.
Last edited by evensteadiereddie on Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.

# 18
evensteadiereddie
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby evensteadiereddie » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:43 pm

Pearcey wrote:Sounds a nightmare. Keep your head up if you can. You’ll be Dyche fit before you know it.


Don't touch and don't go ?

# 19
BurningBeard
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby BurningBeard » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:44 pm

Great name for a death metal or grindcore band.
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# 20
Lord Beamish
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Lord Beamish » Fri Jun 14, 2019 12:56 pm

Blackrod wrote:Opening this thread has just put me off my lunch.

I wouldn’t google image ‘anal fistula’ if I were you. Especially if your lunch has peri peri mayonnaise on it

# 21
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 1:00 pm

kaptin1 wrote:enemy or emema?


Do you mean enema you plonker?!

# 22
bfcjg
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby bfcjg » Fri Jun 14, 2019 1:00 pm

Bugger I thought we'd signed a hot shot Albanian striker.

# 23
Herts Clarets
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Herts Clarets » Fri Jun 14, 2019 1:30 pm

Pretty sure this is what my wife suffered with. She had 2 bouts of surgery to sort it out and the pain she endured was heartbreaking to watch. Fingers crossed it is 3 years since the second operation and so far it seems to have worked.

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Imploding Turtle
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Imploding Turtle » Fri Jun 14, 2019 1:31 pm

Herts Clarets wrote:Pretty sure this is what my wife suffered with. She had 2 bouts of surgery to sort it out and the pain she endured was heartbreaking to watch. Fingers crossed it is 3 years since the second operation and so far it seems to have worked.


So you're saying it no longer herts?
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evensteadiereddie
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby evensteadiereddie » Fri Jun 14, 2019 1:38 pm

Healeywoodclaret wrote:Do you mean enema you plonker?!


It's an alimentary mistake that anybody could make.
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# 26
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 1:39 pm

Herts Clarets wrote:Pretty sure this is what my wife suffered with. She had 2 bouts of surgery to sort it out and the pain she endured was heartbreaking to watch. Fingers crossed it is 3 years since the second operation and so far it seems to have worked.


Glad to hear she is okay now. When you are in a world of pain you can't see any end to it. You can't sleep either because of the pain. So thanks for sharing your thoughts. Once you've experienced this I doubt you'd ever forget it and be very cautious forever more.

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Lancasterclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Lancasterclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 1:48 pm

You have no idea the self control required not to take advantage of the numerous potential gags with this thread.

But it sounds absolutely awful, so hopefully you will get better asap.

# 28
Lord Beamish
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Lord Beamish » Fri Jun 14, 2019 1:58 pm

It is said that Auden wrote this about his own Anal Fissure. Enjoy.

https://www.snarke.com/2009/05/letter-to-wound.html?m=1

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evensteadiereddie
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby evensteadiereddie » Fri Jun 14, 2019 2:10 pm

Well found, LB.
He had a wry sense of humour, I'll give him that.

# 30
Murger
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Murger » Fri Jun 14, 2019 2:36 pm

Always wanted to try this with the missus.

# 31
Sproggy
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Sproggy » Fri Jun 14, 2019 2:38 pm

Next on my list after Cheddar Gorge.

# 32
Cleveleys_claret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Cleveleys_claret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 3:32 pm

Healeywoodclaret wrote:Cheers Pearcey. No word of a lie the absolute worst pain I've ever felt. I'm female by the way and gave birth to two children with only gas and air. I feel like I've been in labour for the past two weeks. Walking round the house like a wounded animal! Muscle spasms both. Very painful and very debilitating.


Bet your hubby was pleased with himself though.... boasting to his all workmates

# 33
AndyClaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby AndyClaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 3:50 pm

ripped her a new one, literally.

# 34
IanMcL
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby IanMcL » Fri Jun 14, 2019 3:55 pm

Sounds like caving!
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Rick_Muller
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Rick_Muller » Fri Jun 14, 2019 4:00 pm

Healeywoodclaret wrote:Anyone ever had one? A bit personal I know but the pain associated with anal Fissure is immense. Quite common just wondered if anyone else has suffered with this?

I know your pain! I have suffered with all sorts in the nether regions as complications of my Colitis. The perianal abscess was fun...! :x :twisted: I dont have any advise apart from trust the doctors and nurses, surgery may be the only way to reduce/remove the pain.

If it's any consolation I am going for the film crew up the shoot on the 29th for my regular check up (joy!) - it always surprises me how much length they can manage to insert up there...

# 36
Dodobdobodobo
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Dodobdobodobo » Fri Jun 14, 2019 4:10 pm

‘The Lords Stretch’ awaits :D

# 37
claretonthecoast1882
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby claretonthecoast1882 » Fri Jun 14, 2019 4:11 pm

Lube is your friend

# 38
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 4:47 pm

Cleveleys_claret wrote:Bet your hubby was pleased with himself though.... boasting to his all workmates


He reckons the sex noises floating out of our bathroom window have done his Street Cred no harm at all!
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# 39
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 4:51 pm

Lancasterclaret wrote:You have no idea the self control required not to take advantage of the numerous potential gags with this thread.

But it sounds absolutely awful, so hopefully you will get better asap.


It's really hard to find any humour in it Lancs. If you've never experienced rectal pain and I hope you never do, boy it's excruciatingly painful. The only other pain I have experienced like it is labour pain. Both are muscle spasm so it figures.

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Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 4:58 pm

Rick_Muller wrote:I know your pain! I have suffered with all sorts in the nether regions as complications of my Colitis. The perianal abscess was fun...! :x :twisted: I dont have any advise apart from trust the doctors and nurses, surgery may be the only way to reduce/remove the pain.

If it's any consolation I am going for the film crew up the shoot on the 29th for my regular check up (joy!) - it always surprises me how much length they can manage to insert up there...


That's a lot of information Rick! I'm hoping to avoid the scope with careful management. If I come out the other side it is not something I will forget in a hurry. Needless to say I have been signed off because for the first six hours or so of the day I can't even think straight the pain is so bad. I'm spending much of that time in the labouring delivery position!

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dougcollins
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby dougcollins » Fri Jun 14, 2019 6:24 pm

I thought you were on about a new death metal band.

# 42
Cleveleys_claret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Cleveleys_claret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 6:37 pm

Healeywoodclaret wrote:That's a lot of information Rick! I'm hoping to avoid the scope with careful management. If I come out the other side it is not something I will forget in a hurry. Needless to say I have been signed off because for the first six hours or so of the day I can't even think straight the pain is so bad. I'm spending much of that time in the labouring delivery position!


Was your hubby hoping to come out the other side?

Sorry but there is just so much material!!!!

# 43
Inchy
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Inchy » Fri Jun 14, 2019 7:49 pm

I’ve seen a few ops on them and Jesus it looks painful.

Hope you get it sorted

# 44
spadesclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby spadesclaret » Fri Jun 14, 2019 8:47 pm

A few years ago Mr. spades had to have an operation for haemorrhoids. When he came round the surgeon told him he had 'mended' a fissure while he was at it. He told Mr. spades that the first few times he had an evacuation it would be like passing hedgehogs. Strangely, this didn't happen. Mr. spades said it was more like passing a cuddly toy.
Perhaps he was just lucky or perhaps the surgeon was very good at his job but he has had no trouble since.

# 45
martin_p
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby martin_p » Fri Jun 14, 2019 9:45 pm

Healeywoodclaret wrote:Anyone ever had one?


No, but I once knew an Alan Fisher and he was a pain in the arse too.
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# 46
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Sat Jun 15, 2019 11:35 am

Inchy wrote:I’ve seen a few ops on them and Jesus it looks painful.

Hope you get it sorted


The op involves cutting into the sphincter muscle to control the spasms. Surgically I don't think there's a lot they can do for a fissure unless it is big enough to require a stitch. Fissures have to heal themselves and the only way that can happen us if the spasms are under control. It's certainly been a learning curve and very difficult to manage. Thanks for your good wishes.

# 47
Healeywoodclaret
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Healeywoodclaret » Sat Jun 15, 2019 11:40 am

Inchy wrote:I’ve seen a few ops on them and Jesus it looks painful.

Hope you get it sorted


Surgery involves cutting into the sphincter muscle to control the spasms. Surgically there's not a lot they can do for fissures unless it's so big it requires a Stitch. Generally they have to heal by themselves and that can only happen if the spasms are controlled. The GTN widens the blood vessels allowing the fissure to heal. It's certainly been a learning curve. Thanks for your good wishes. Pain is very humbling!

# 48
Clarets4me
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Clarets4me » Sat Jun 15, 2019 11:42 am

Is it Carrie's brother ?
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# 49
evensteadiereddie
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby evensteadiereddie » Sat Jun 15, 2019 11:53 am

I always wondered exactly where the Northwest Passage was......

# 50
Bfcboyo
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Re: Anal Fissure

Postby Bfcboyo » Sat Jun 15, 2019 4:22 pm

Healeywoodclaret wrote:Anyone ever had one? A bit personal I know but the pain associated with anal Fissure is immense. Quite common just wondered if anyone else has suffered with this?


Best avoid anal sex for a bit.


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