I wouldn't class myself as a dependent however last night I had a big wake up call, I fell and hit my head on the pavement and knocked my tooth out. However it's having an affect on my personal life and was wondering if anyone managed to stop drinking completely? It's my means of relaxing at a weekend and means to socialise but I think the time has come now to make a change. Has anyone any tips or similar experiences that they'd like to share?

Thanks in advance.

George Best

Serious answers please, it takes a lot to be honest with myself.

It’s October in two days. Why not try Stoptober, not for anyone else, but for yourself, and see where you go from there.
Good luck, mate.

I’ve been quite bad over the last few months and after a heavy night 2 weeks ago decided not to drink again before my holiday in another 3 weeks

After 2 weeks I don’t feel any better or worse but I am also not bothered about a drink.

Definitely going to do stoptober

Moderation.

I had a swill today, but I could quite easily not have had a drink.

Enjoy a drink, but don’t let it take over.

I don’t care what anyone says, that’s relatively straight forward.

Good luck

gandhisflipflop wrote:I wouldn't class myself as a dependent however last night I had a big wake up call, I fell and hit my head on the pavement and knocked my tooth out. However it's having an affect on my personal life and was wondering if anyone managed to stop drinking completely? It's my means of relaxing at a weekend and means to socialise but I think the time has come now to make a change. Has anyone any tips or similar experiences that they'd like to share?

Thanks in advance.

Good luck in your quest mate,the demon drink is a hell of a thing to kick in to touch

Not completely, but I can count on one hand how many drinks I've had this year.

I stopped any sort of heavy drinking about 15 years ago and then about 6 years ago I stopped with the binge drinking on the occasional Saturday night.

I just reached the point where I found it pretty boring as a rule of thumb.
I can still occasionally have a night out if I want too, and keep up with people, and I've just been roped into a messy weekend at Butlins next year which I fully expect to be very messy

You just need to decide if you want the drink to control your social life.

bobinho wrote:Moderation.

I had a swill today, but I could quite easily not have had a drink.

Enjoy a drink, but don’t let it take over.

I don’t care what anyone says, that’s relatively straight forward.

Good luck

That's the bit I struggle with. I don't go out to get hammered I just don't know when to stop and it's really worrying me.

Steve1956 wrote:Good luck in your quest mate,the demon drink is a hell of a thing to kick in to touch

Thanks mate. Yeah I'm not expecting it to be easy

Yep. Am on day 28 now. Was getting worried about how often and how much I would drink. Was piling weight on and quite frequently getting totally wasted. Feeling much better, and the biggest help has been alc free beer. The Brooklyn one is very good.

Since having kids I find myself just having a few on a couple of evenings a week whist watching tele with the wife.

However since having kids I have had the opportunity a few times to really drink, be it a stag do, a wedding, work night out etc.

On a few of those occasions I have got leathered, blind drunk. I lost my phone not long since which cost me 400 quid. I think it’s because I have lost my tolerance to binge drinking which I had in my 20s, and I really go to town when I have the chance because I rarely do these days.

I have to make a conscious effort when the opportunity arises not to get totally sloshed. It’s not worth the hangover and anxiety.

I’m am not an alcoholic but some of the states I have got in I wouldn’t deny that I have a problem with binge drinking on the rare occasion I have the chance.

Fortunately I have realised this so when I have the chance to get leathered I make an effort to really pace myself and listen to that voice on my head that says “slow down”

Good luck but learning your limit and stopping one before would be a start.

Inchy I am (or was ) like that too and also caning the wine when at home and caning it when working away.

I had a few periods where I stopped drinking for a month or so, just to freshen up.
Usually after doing something stupid or waking up with a regret or 2.

It's not usually having a drink that's the issue, it's the amount you drink or who you're doing it with.

Have a bit if time off it, but if you do decide you enjoy the odd pint, then limit yourself either in drinks or in cash you take out.

I found taking a set amount of money out with no bank card meant I wasn't coming in 16 hours after starting.
Only issue then is if you win some cash and celebrate more.

I wouldn't say going tee total is needed unless you're alcohol dependent.

Hi mate,

Not sure if this will be of any help but I’ll tell you my experiences with the old drink.

In my late teens into my early 20s I was surrounded by a culture within work that used to go out every weekend. I was spending upwards of £100 a week on just going out.

I went out because I was scared of missing something. I went hard and then went home with a hangover from hell and usually a Papa Sams or K2s.

I then began drinking alone at home, be it listening to music or whatever I was doing I was just pouring wine or sinking cans of lager without thinking it was affecting me.

I did that for a long while which culminated in a friends 23rd birthday party where I just got completely messy and did some stupid things that I regret. This, coupled with receiving bad news about my dad made me decide to just stop cold turkey. I didn’t drink for 5 whole years. I took to it hard at first and everyone laughed at me and thought I was just having a sulk. After a while people got used to it and I would go out and just have a bottle of water or a cola and would generally end up being the sensible one who stopped altercations or who would look after my collapsing friends.

The best thing to do really is to just take it slowly and don’t give yourself a goal and don’t do it for any other reason other than yourself otherwise you’ll feel like a failure if you have a drink.

Also , you won’t have any life changing revelations and I don’t think you’ll feel any different other than a thicker wallet so don’t feel bad if you don’t suddenly start feeling like a million dollars.

I’m back on the beers now but I tend to drink for the enjoyment of the drink and I don’t get hammered any more.

Good luck.

It is impossible for some people to learn your limit and stop one before. Some people just keep going til oblivion.

Stopped drinking about 10 years ago after having children. Didn’t like having to get up early with a foggy head even after only having a couple of drinks. Didn’t drink a lot but not drunk anything since then. Don’t miss it at all.

Work out how much a month you spend on drink,open a seperate savings account at your bank and transfer every month that amount from your current account.
Then sit back and watch your savings grow.Perhaps treat yourself to a nice holiday.

I probably do drink too much in summer still. Only 4 small cans of ipa a few times a week but it all adds up.

I exercise a lot so don’t have weight issues and have gone through periods where i have drank nothing and haven’t found it difficult.

It’s just the binge drinking that gets me. Knowing when to stop. I really have to try hard to not get leathered when I have the chance.

It’s weird because before kids I was out most weekends binge drinking but very rarely got blind drunk. Now with kids if I rarely (4 times a year) get the chance to get leathered I do.

As I say I realised it wasn’t worth it some time back but I know I can easy get leathered again if the chance arises. It really isn’t worth the hangover and even worse the anxiety

LS7 wrote:It is impossible for some people to learn your limit and stop one before. Some people just keep going til oblivion.

The latter is me.

Once I get to a certain stage, I end up going down the shoot to the point I cant remember getting in, cringe hearing the stories of the night before, or wake up in such a state I'm surprised I'm still alive / home, or all 3.

Now I try and set a home time, or take just a limited amount of money out with me.

Saying that I rarely plan a full on day/night bender like I would have done years ago.

MACCA wrote:
It's not usually having a drink that's the issue, it's the amount you drink or who you're doing it with.



I wouldn't say going tee total is needed unless you're alcohol dependent.

100 percent agree with this. Its not the drink in my case. Usually the amount, the mixture and the environment and people.

Definitely made a conscious effort to manage those factors. And tbh rarely drink at all. But today fancied a half guinness in day and for first time in god knows how long a couple at home.

If you have a problem with it best thing to do is try identify the problem, and the potential outcomes and manage that.

Ive some mates i could go on a proper session with and youd only have good memories. But there are other instances where even a couple could pose a problem in that environment so dont bother.

Easier said than done to identify and acknowledge it. And even tougher I imagine if youve not got willpower to manage it.

Good luck. If youve acknowledged its an issue and want to sort it thats the biggest step.

Stopped drinking COMPLETELY seven years ago.
Haven't had a drop of alcohol since, not even a liquer chocolate at Christmas.

The hardest thing I found was finding something else to drink that's decent and healthy and replaces booze and tastes good, like you can't stop drinking alcohol and then switch to just drinking Coke for example.

Now I drink coffee and a brilliant sparkling water called Vichy Catalan because if you give up drinking you can drink your recommended daily intake of water instead.

I've been "alcohol free" since early 2016. Nothing more than the "odd sip" if "something bubbly" is being passed around to toast "bride and groom" or "new baby" etc. Other than that "alcohol free" beer is my friend. There's now a lot of great alcohol free beers - which often means no more than 0.5% alcohol, sometimes lower. Agree with LS7, Brooklyn Special Effects, is a treat. The Small Beer Brew Co have 4 beers ranging in strength from 1.0% to 2.7% - all great.

Good luck, gandhisflipflop.

BFCmaj wrote:Stopped drinking about 10 years ago after having children. Didn’t like having to get up early with a foggy head even after only having a couple of drinks. Didn’t drink a lot but not drunk anything since then. Don’t miss it at all.

That's about the same for me and I also suffered from Cluster Migraines which cleared up when I stopped drinking and smoking,

gandhisflipflop wrote:I wouldn't class myself as a dependent however last night I had a big wake up call, I fell and hit my head on the pavement and knocked my tooth out. However it's having an affect on my personal life and was wondering if anyone managed to stop drinking completely? It's my means of relaxing at a weekend and means to socialise but I think the time has come now to make a change. Has anyone any tips or similar experiences that they'd like to share?

Thanks in advance.

First things first

Well done for realising you need to do something about it. That's the biggest step you will ever take.

Last year I decided to do stoptober. This was always going to be challenging given i drank every day a couple or 3 pints.
I am very fit but the extra weight i was carrying was making my refereeing career a lot harder especially as I was going up the pyramid and the physical demands obviously are much greater.
I can not have 1 drink as always want that 2nd or 3rd.

As we get older it gets harder to shift that middle bit of our bodies.

Survived stoptober and kept it going through to Christmas, had a few but not many as had a busy festive season with football.

Managed to drop the weight from just over 11 stone back to optimum of 10 stone. This might not sound a lot but I only stand at 5 ft 6. That 10% extra body weight was tough to carry around the field of play.

Since then have started to drink more again due to some personal matters. That said i really try and keep the alcohol intake down.
Weight has gone back on but nowhere near the previous levels.

Back from my game today and will have a few beers tonight. Cant wait for stoptober to start again, gives me a real focus not to drink.
Like others have said if you are able to moderate then great, i am one of those that cant. All or nothing for me.
October is the start of no alcohol again.

Hope my last 12 months gives you a bit of inspiration. Swap beer and wine for pints of water. I regularly drink 5 pints of water a day.

Good luck, hope you succeed. It's not easy and you need that perseverance.

Dp

Rocktober, my birthday, not a chance

Just recently I’ve started picking up a few bottles of root beer. Prefer them to the ‘non alco lagers’. Only time I go to the pub now is to watch a televised away game. I’ll have either 2 or 3 and then go home. If I’m honest with you, I’m gonna say that two or three on this thread know it’s time to jack it in or at least take a break. Do it, there’s nowt wrong in taking a decision that will be for the best for you and your families, especially your kids where that applies. If going to the pub is becoming a problem, then don’t go, do summat else. Take control and good luck to each and everyone of you. You should know when it’s time to sort it out.

Mate, I stopped years ago for the reason that my body couldn’t take it anymore especially when combined with the medications and treatment for my IBD. I thought I’d miss it, but I don’t. The clarity of thought when out and everyone else is drinking is quite enlightening, you tend to see how you probably were, and for me that was an eye opener!

Now, to say I’m teetotal isn’t actually true. I’ll occasionally taste a fine whisky or bourbon, but that’s it. I used to hate spirits, and love beer. Now I hate beer (it hates me too, the feeling is mutual I suppose!) and I enjoy an occasional shot. I don’t drink to get bladdered, I enjoy the taste of a fine drink instead, and I never drink out as I’m usually driving.

Good luck mate

Inchy wrote:Since having kids I find myself just having a few on a couple of evenings a week whist watching tele with the wife.

However since having kids I have had the opportunity a few times to really drink, be it a stag do, a wedding, work night out etc.

On a few of those occasions I have got leathered, blind drunk. I lost my phone not long since which cost me 400 quid. I think it’s because I have lost my tolerance to binge drinking which I had in my 20s, and I really go to town when I have the chance because I rarely do these days.

I have to make a conscious effort when the opportunity arises not to get totally sloshed. It’s not worth the hangover and anxiety.

I’m am not an alcoholic but some of the states I have got in I wouldn’t deny that I have a problem with binge drinking on the rare occasion I have the chance.

Fortunately I have realised this so when I have the chance to get leathered I make an effort to really pace myself and listen to that voice on my head that says “slow down”

Children; such a good cause and reason to moderate drinking. Identify with what you've said

Unfortunately, anybody over the age of 35 in Britain will have grown up in a social circle with alcohol at the forefront. With binge drinking the norm.

Gaining friends who you have nothing in common with whilst sober.

Luckily I think everyone finds a point in their life where you realise alcohol isn't very good for you. At least not in large amounts.

Good luck with your choices.

A lot of kids these days are always at the gym and rarely drink which is good. A lot less binge drinking compared to when I grew up.

Having kids did stop me binge drinking 3/4 times a month.

But it is strange, I would never drink half a bottle
Of wine on a Thursday when I was younger. Now
Me and my Wife do that a couple of times a week. Not sure what’s worse.

I might try stoptober for the challenge. I don’t have any big nights planned this Month so shouldn’t be too hard.

It’s not getting totally sloshed when I’m at a wedding or stag do which I find hard

Thanks for the replies. I will be 30 next year and since turning 18 alcohol has been the forefront of most if not all of my activities. I'd hate Sunday fixtures for example because I couldn't drink as I had work the next day. I was out last night after having a week off work celebrating moving into a beautiful apartment with a great girl and to see her so upset with me made me realise what I could end up losing if I'm not careful. I'm going to have a complete culture shift and it starts now.

Purposely decided not to read everyone’s replies before I did as it’s easy to reply as you feel you should.

I only drink at weekends, my Mrs drinks once every blue moon when she’s out with the girls. When I drink I can at times be hard work, and I hate myself for it! I’m only 30 and drink far less often than I did and have told myself that one day I’ll knock it on the head. I’ve actually stopped going on the turf to get out of the friendship circle habit. I’ve always said I haven’t a problem and can control it, but deep down I know I have. I’ve a very good job and a great partner, I’m hoping that I’m slowly growing out of it

gandhisflipflop wrote:Thanks for the replies. I will be 30 next year and since turning 18 alcohol has been the forefront of most if not all of my activities. I'd hate Sunday fixtures for example because I couldn't drink as I had work the next day. I was out last night after having a week off work celebrating moving into a beautiful apartment with a great girl and to see her so upset with me made me realise what I could end up losing if I'm not careful. I'm going to have a complete culture shift and it starts now.

Aaron you need a proper drinking partner

Burnley1989 wrote:Purposely decided not to read everyone’s replies before I did as it’s easy to reply as you feel you should.

I only drink at weekends, my Mrs drinks once every blue moon when she’s out with the girls. When I drink I can at times be hard work, and I hate myself for it! I’m only 30 and drink far less often than I did and have told myself that one day I’ll knock it on the head. I’ve actually stopped going on the turf to get out of the friendship circle habit. I’ve always said I haven’t a problem and can control it, but deep down I know I have. I’ve a very good job and a great partner, I’m hoping that I’m slowly growing out of it

Thats it. The habits / routune, circles and environment are the bad combo.

Address them and its way easier

JohnDearyMe wrote:Children; such a good cause and reason to moderate drinking. Identify with what you've said

Absolutely agree with this.

Since my two boys arrived, I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve had a proper session in approaching three years.

I do like a Craft Beer, so I may well have one can a week as a treat after a busy set of shifts. That’s it.

Drinking (to excess) is massively overrated, and I don’t miss it at all. As Sid said further up, it’s boring and a huge waste of money.

Good on you for acknowledging a change is needed, and I wish you good luck!

I have friends though that love to scream ‘I’ve not been out in 6 month’ but they’re miserable as fu##

There’s a real balance to be had

I like the honesty of many on this thread.

Truth is this country has a terrible drink culture. You are not alone.

As a teenager and into my early 20’s I would drink so much on a night out that I might not remember the next day or two.

I cut back for many years but find I now drink 70-80 units a week. Red wine. What’s sad is a bottle each night doesn’t even give me a headache the following day. But I know it’s affecting my health.

It doesn’t make me drunk or slur my words. But the back pain and extra weight I now carry and the side effects. I know my kidneys need a break.

TsarBomba wrote:Absolutely agree with this.

Since my two boys arrived, I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve had a proper session in approaching three years.

I do like a Craft Beer, so I may well have one can a week as a treat after a busy set of shifts. That’s it.

Drinking (to excess) is massively overrated, and I don’t miss it at all. As Sid said further up, it’s boring and a huge waste of money.

Good on you for acknowledging a change is needed, and I wish you good luck!

Same here essentially, even though mine are 12 and 10 now.

I have a beer before the match, and that is it.

No beer in the house either.

Drink far too much coffee though!

LoveCurryPies wrote:I like the honesty of many on this thread.

Truth is this country has a terrible drink culture. You are not alone.

As a teenager and into my early 20’s I would drink so much on a night out that I might not remember the next day or two.

I cut back for many years but find I now drink 70-80 units a week. Red wine. What’s sad is a bottle each night doesn’t even give me a headache the following day. But I know it’s affecting my health.

It doesn’t make me drunk or slur my words. But the back pain and extra weight I now carry and the side effects. I know my kidneys need a break.

I’ve a bar in my house with about 1k of red wine and I act like I’m proud as punch to my friends and family.. sad really

I've gone through 3 stages with alcohol used to shovel pints down when I was in my 20/30s moved on to shovelling down wine 40/60s I've now tired of it and have an occasional dram,never thought I had a problem with it but I suppose I had because I needed it,I've seen it ruin many friends lifes,,things we enjoy ruin us sad but true

It's too late for me, but save yourself gandhisflipflop.

Good luck fella.

Not drinking at all is very hard as when you go to footy or you "socialise" it's usually a massive part of both, but in between those times I find it easy to not drink. I don't drink at home (as there's nothing social about drinking in the house) or deliberately go out just for a drink. That often means I have a few pints every other Saturday, when Burnley are at home, or sometimes on away trips, but I also have lots of "dry time" in between. That way I actually enjoy the beers I do have and never think of enjoying it as any kind of problem.

I stopped drinking in February after another horrible hangover and a few days of the ‘booze blues’ or ‘beer fear’ after a friends wedding. This inevitably led to eating rubbish and feeling sluggish, fatigued and sorry for myself for most of the week after.

Never been a big drinker, and always really struggled to hold my alcohol in comparison to others, but really struggled when in certain circles to slow down or stop, leading to the embarrassment and uncertainty the morning after the night before ( on top of the hangover). Typical binge drinker once every couple of months that sort of thing.

I would echo what a couple on here have already said. Identify the situations/ circles that you get drunk in and avoid them. Or otherwise if you can’t avoid (weddings, birthdays etc), go late, when you know people have started drinking. Have a couple of cokes or lemonades in a short glass and then ‘smoke bomb’ when you are ready to leave. People who are drinking very rarely notice when someone has gone til you are halfway home, but it’s impossible to leave when you try and justify to drinkers on a session that you are going home. They will chip at you til you submit and have a pint.

Accept that things will have to change and that you will miss out on certain times, but it’s all for a better cause. In my case my wife and daughter and in your case, yourself and your partner.

My wife was 3 months pregnant at the time and whilst I don’t think it solves all of life’s struggles, it’s better knowing that you can face them without the hell of a hangover.

Beyond that, get a new hobbie with the money saved. I’m a firm believer in nature and exercise being the best combination, so get yourself up the lakes with that lass of yours or the Yorkshire dales, or Peak District with the money you will save.

And finally remember, help is always available via a health practitioner if you think you need just that extra bit of structure.

Very best of luck mate.

Yes, I stopped pretty much completely a few years back as in combination with my drug cocktail it was going to f up my liver.
I don't miss it much. I might have about 5 - 10 drinks per year, but think it's less as I don't really care. Its more annoying, people wanting to get you to drink but there are places I don't go to now that I suppose I never liked and getting ****** was an easy way to get through the evening rather than being bored shitless.

For those who struggle with excess (as I do) my advice is simply:

Ignore those voices who say ‘just have one or two and enjoy them’. Those voices don’t empathise that 1/2/3 is not enough. They don’t understand that ‘More’ is the magic number.

Instead my advice is to abstain for at least 3 months. 100% no alcohol. I did it and it’s ****...but you realise that you’ve been missing a lot of the goodness in life.

The final step is to combine both methods. You’ve proved you have the discipline to not drink. But it’s also ok you miss being wasted. So pick one weekend out of four you are going to let loose. BUT hold your discipline for the other three.

Means you’re in control AND life works for you

AotearoaClaret wrote:I stopped drinking in February after another horrible hangover and a few days of the ‘booze blues’ or ‘beer fear’ after a friends wedding. This inevitably led to eating rubbish and feeling sluggish, fatigued and sorry for myself for most of the week after.

Never been a big drinker, and always really struggled to hold my alcohol in comparison to others, but really struggled when in certain circles to slow down or stop, leading to the embarrassment and uncertainty the morning after the night before ( on top of the hangover). Typical binge drinker once every couple of months that sort of thing.

I would echo what a couple on here have already said. Identify the situations/ circles that you get drunk in and avoid them. Or otherwise if you can’t avoid (weddings, birthdays etc), go late, when you know people have started drinking. Have a couple of cokes or lemonades in a short glass and then ‘smoke bomb’ when you are ready to leave. People who are drinking very rarely notice when someone has gone til you are halfway home, but it’s impossible to leave when you try and justify to drinkers on a session that you are going home. They will chip at you til you submit and have a pint.

Accept that things will have to change and that you will miss out on certain times, but it’s all for a better cause. In my case my wife and daughter and in your case, yourself and your partner.

My wife was 3 months pregnant at the time and whilst I don’t think it solves all of life’s struggles, it’s better knowing that you can face them without the hell of a hangover.

Beyond that, get a new hobbie with the money saved. I’m a firm believer in nature and exercise being the best combination, so get yourself up the lakes with that lass of yours or the Yorkshire dales, or Peak District with the money you will save.

And finally remember, help is always available via a health practitioner if you think you need just that extra bit of structure.

Very best of luck mate.

Excellent post