Gwyneth Paltrow
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Gwyneth Paltrow
Selling Vagina scented candles..
Straight from the Manx kipper factory .
https://www.refinery29.com/en-gb/2020/0 ... dle-vagina
Straight from the Manx kipper factory .
https://www.refinery29.com/en-gb/2020/0 ... dle-vagina
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Jesus
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Mines coming on Friday, I’ll let you know what it’s like as long as my gentleman’s paste doesn’t put it out.
This user liked this post: Fenwick
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Roses are red,
And there's no scent finer.
And there's no scent finer.
Last edited by FactualFrank on Tue Jan 14, 2020 9:37 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
I'd rather find out how it smelled in person tbh
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
. thinks it may smell like the above posters username.
This user liked this post: Bordeauxclaret
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Any scoffing or negative comment and you're a misogynist. No mistake.
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Jim Royle has brought out an aftershave..
"My Arse"
"My Arse"
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
it's called the Grimsby glimmer.
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
the candle contains hints of “geranium, citrusy bergamot, and cedar absolutes juxtaposed with Damask rose and ambrette seed.”
Sounds like the guff you read on all this new age artisanal gin.
Can’t say I’ve ever some across one that smells like pot pourri. Savoury yes, florally fragrant no.
Sounds like the guff you read on all this new age artisanal gin.
Can’t say I’ve ever some across one that smells like pot pourri. Savoury yes, florally fragrant no.
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
does it say anywhere how she intends to market them ? definately needs a catchy brand name.
I could help her design the wick.
I could help her design the wick.
Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Just asking for a friend... are they edible...? And do they actually tas.... smell like Gwyneth’s furrow...?
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Rather unsurprisingly Gwyneths snatch aroma is not “ eau du fishmarket” but pretty much like your regular scrubber ...
“geranium, citrusy bergamot, and cedar absolutes juxtaposed with Damask rose and ambrette seed.”
I often thought the same at 4am lapping away drunkenly on some tarts snatch after 14 pints.
“geranium, citrusy bergamot, and cedar absolutes juxtaposed with Damask rose and ambrette seed.”
I often thought the same at 4am lapping away drunkenly on some tarts snatch after 14 pints.
These 2 users liked this post: Zlatan Steve1956
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
So it's not gonna smell like the toilet seat on a Grimsby trawler then?
This user liked this post: IanMcL
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Gentlemen's pastesnapcrackleandpop wrote: ↑Mon Jan 13, 2020 7:20 pmMines coming on Friday, I’ll let you know what it’s like as long as my gentleman’s paste doesn’t put it out.
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
[quote=AlargeClaret post_id=1184865 time=1578952091 user_id=3700
I often thought the same at 4am lapping away drunkenly on some tarts snatch after 14 pints.
[/quote]
Have you ever considered writing romantic fiction
I often thought the same at 4am lapping away drunkenly on some tarts snatch after 14 pints.
[/quote]
Have you ever considered writing romantic fiction
This user liked this post: Bosscat
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Hi, Alistair. I thought you saved your best stuff for the lads mags?AlargeClaret wrote: ↑Mon Jan 13, 2020 9:48 pmI often thought the same at 4am lapping away drunkenly on some tarts snatch after 14 pints.
Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
This the weirdo that hangs around with her ex and his mrs
Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
'The origin story of the name is pretty goopy: Paltrow and perfumer Douglas Little were working on a new fragrance and Paltrow suddenly said, "Uhhh...this smells like a vagina." '
According to the OP's link.
Reminds me of WW2 radar on RAF bombers:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/H2S_(radar)
See 'Etymology'. Someone said about it's delay into production that 'it stinks' and so it was christened H2S - Hydrogen sulphide - rotten eggs or stink bombs.
According to the OP's link.
Reminds me of WW2 radar on RAF bombers:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/H2S_(radar)
See 'Etymology'. Someone said about it's delay into production that 'it stinks' and so it was christened H2S - Hydrogen sulphide - rotten eggs or stink bombs.
Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
One or two on here Steve have already patented that one judging by replies to some posts
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
It all sounds a bit fishy to me
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Gwyneth is probs one of those women that doesn’t even poo, unlike say Madonna who famously requested a fully private toilet facility in her Glastonbury rider due to previously dropping a huge log and clogging the backstage bogs at a concert venue .Though for someone who openly admits to drinking their own p1ss it’s not surprise . Gwyneths is no doubt some scented amber nectar from the goddess Aphrodite or suchlike
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
I cant get the image of Madonna sat on the bog trying to depart with a huge log out of my head now,I can almost see her face grimacingAlargeClaret wrote: ↑Tue Jan 14, 2020 11:48 amGwyneth is probs one of those women that doesn’t even poo, unlike say Madonna who famously requested a fully private toilet facility in her Glastonbury rider due to previously dropping a huge log and clogging the backstage bogs at a concert venue .Though for someone who openly admits to drinking their own p1ss it’s not surprise . Gwyneths is no doubt some scented amber nectar from the goddess Aphrodite or suchlike
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Lets hope there is no lingering smell of the tree hugger chris martin on her candle
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Fanny smelling candles are not a new idea. They were very popular in convents at one time I hear.
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
She's either going out with a Sommelier or she is lacking one of the five senses. Or more than likely both
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Could add a whole new dimension to strip poker;
'... Call your Vagina Candle and, raise you The Wick-er Man...'
'... Call your Vagina Candle and, raise you The Wick-er Man...'
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
I’ve always found that some are sommelier than others
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
This is the out cum when you burn the candle at both ends
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Perhaps they’ll bring out a “ celebrity bumhole” airfreshner range? where you can impress friends and family by secretly spraying the bathroom with the erm “ after dump aroma of your chosen celeb “ and when they there say ” Feck me Steve whose been in here ?” You can nonchalantly tell them “ oh it’s just Madonna again she can’t half lay some cable that lass” ...
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
Lay some cable
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
You are all a disgrace and should be ashamed of yourselves.
Fancy discussing such matters on a footy forum. Dear oh dear.
Fancy discussing such matters on a footy forum. Dear oh dear.
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Re: Gwyneth Paltrow
I'll always hold a candle for her. Just didn't realise she'd want me to hold it "there" so it picks up a whiff of her