Does anyone elses wife/partner talk about work after clocking off?

My mum used to do it.

My wife and mother in law have a good half hour conversation/moan to every night on the phone.

I finish work and instantly forget or care about what has happened in that part of the day.

fanzone wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 6:58 pm

Does anyone elses wife/partner talk about work after clocking off?

My mum used to do it.

My wife and mother in law have a good half hour conversation/moan to every night on the phone.

I finish work and instantly forget or care about what has happened in that part of the day.

My wife knows it winds me up. Especially if people at work upset her and she said she'd stop talking about work two years ago.

I still get told what happened at work every morning when I myself get back from work.

The joy!

It was certainly my experience. I knew as much about Mrs CM job as she did and had to endure about who did what and what was said until my ears bled every night.

I think it’s a female thing similar to why they have to tell you about their dreams. Never perfect like us blokes :

Cirrus_Minor wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 7:05 pm

I think it’s a female thing similar to why they have to tell you about their dreams.

Oh don't remind me. Wife was furious with me for sleeping with another woman in her dream the other week. Didn't talk to me all day.

BenWickes wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 7:10 pm

Oh don't remind me. Wife was furious with me for sleeping with another woman in her dream the other week. Didn't talk to me all day.

Happens to me once a week. Beginning to think she thinks I’m some sort of Hugh Hefner spin off

fanzone wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 6:58 pm

Does anyone elses wife/partner talk about work after clocking off?

My mum used to do it.

My wife and mother in law have a good half hour conversation/moan to every night on the phone.

I finish work and instantly forget or care about what has happened in that part of the day.

What do you prefer to talk about?

fanzone wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 6:58 pm

Does anyone elses wife/partner talk about work after clocking off?

My mum used to do it.

My wife and mother in law have a good half hour conversation/moan to every night on the phone.

I finish work and instantly forget or care about what has happened in that part of the day.

If she starts talking about the new guy at work "GodisaDJ" start worrying

What’s worse is when Mrs Zlatan will FaceTime me from her work to moan about something her boss has asked her to do (legitimate work of course, nothing naughty) and she’ll spend 15-20 minutes moaning about it, and then when she gets in from work... guess what... yeah you guessed I have to have the encore of the whole situation again in more detail.

I learnt the hard way to not say “but sweetheart, you’ve already told me all of this already...” as the retort is usually “you don’t care about me do you...!”

Women eh...

[disclaimer - I still love you Mrs Zlatan]

I had a girlfriend, semi serious and that, and she'd come home from work as a socialist worker or something, I dunno, one of those who make sure the elderly aren't being mugged by their children, and she'd come home ranting about how racist old white men are (quelle surprise non?) and how she's sick of it, but there was one nice jewish guy who offered her a job in his granddaughters business, so I says 'well do it then, instead of pecking my head about how much you hate your racist job' and she says, with no hint of irony, 'no. I couldn't work for a jew.'

BenWickes wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 7:10 pm

Oh don't remind me. Wife was furious with me for sleeping with another woman in her dream the other week. Didn't talk to me all day.

Number of years ago my then wife was in a foul mood when I woke up one morning..
Later that day she told me it was because I'd been talking in my sleep and apparently I'd been dreaming about doing stuff with my ex...
Oops

duncandisorderly wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 7:52 pm

I had a girlfriend, semi serious and that, and she'd come home from work as a socialist worker or something, I dunno, one of those who make sure the elderly aren't being mugged by their children, and she'd come home ranting about how racist old white men are (quelle surprise non?) and how she's sick of it, but there was one nice jewish guy who offered her a job in his granddaughters business, so I says 'well do it then, instead of pecking my head about how much you hate your racist job' and she says, with no hint of irony, 'no. I couldn't work for a jew.'

You dated Jeremy Corbyn.

No homo bromo.

I certainly do, it's because we've evolved past men and can multi-task , we like to share the pain

Didn’t talk about work specifically, a legal secretary, but wherever she worked there was always one person she couldn’t stand. As she won’t cause waves she would bring it all home to me. To be fair not that regularly but as there was nothing I could do about the situation I’d rather have not know.

I positively encourage it, my wife is a nurse. And latterly its become clear that talking about work is a bit of a release valve. She never used to do this. Also, I used to do it a lot, and she endured my workaday tales with good humour.

GodIsADeeJay81 wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 8:06 pm

Number of years ago my then wife was in a foul mood when I woke up one morning..
Later that day she told me it was because I'd been talking in my sleep and apparently I'd been dreaming about doing stuff with my ex...
Oops

This begs the question....was the ex one of the ‘you’re not just here to watch brigade’ or was it a more casual acquaintance than that...

My ex.

Every night, hour by hour update of the most inane detail. About people I'd never met. About boring detail related to procedual detail that was absolutely mind numbing.

She is my ex as she was banging her boss. Funnily enough she never told me about that. Would have been more interesting, the short arsed weasle.

Now if you start a topic about what some partners really get up to at work.......

huw.Y.WattfromWare wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 10:34 pm

Didn’t talk about work specifically, a legal secretary, but wherever she worked there was always one person she couldn’t stand. As she won’t cause waves she would bring it all home to me. To be fair not that regularly but as there was nothing I could do about the situation I’d rather have not know.

Even though I know literally nothing about you or your missus, (and this point applies more generally) I can say with a degree of certainly that she doesn't actually expect you to do a damn thing about the situation. She more than likely just wants to unburden herself of the $hit that is scratching at the back of her mind and feel as though her grievances are at least validated, and she turns to you for that because, I presume, she trusts you. She needs your ear for half an hour, that's all. Again, this is a more general point, not specifically directed at you; "not my problem" isn't really acceptable when you're married to someone because her problems are yours, and vice versa. It's much healthier to be compassionate and attentive toward a person who confides in you all the tiny things which grind them down throughout the day and oftentimes make them feel like they're in a scrap. They confide in you these things so that they feel like they're a little bit less alone in that scrap. It's your choice whether any compassion and empathy you're showing towards her is a performance or actually done in earnest, but making an effort towards doing it in earnest is much more beneficial. Some blokes won't tell you this to your face because they're afraid that saying the words, or anything approaching, "maybe you'd both benefit by showing her a bit more patience and love and respect", would make them look and sound like puffters, but it's all true. Take this as a bit of advice from one anonymous bloke on the internet to another. There's no ego at stake here.

I'm a Bit Sid the sexist... But to be Honest Most "men" talk a good Job....and Most Women Do a good Job and for Sh!t pay. In my Experience.

duncandisorderly wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 7:52 pm

I had a girlfriend, semi serious and that, and she'd come home from work as a socialist worker or something, I dunno, one of those who make sure the elderly aren't being mugged by their children, and she'd come home ranting about how racist old white men are (quelle surprise non?) and how she's sick of it, but there was one nice jewish guy who offered her a job in his granddaughters business, so I says 'well do it then, instead of pecking my head about how much you hate your racist job' and she says, with no hint of irony, 'no. I couldn't work for a jew.'

I don't like this post but I do love it. So much internet in so little space. Glorious.

Spiral wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 11:55 pm

Even though I know literally nothing about you or your missus, (and this point applies more generally) I can say with a degree of certainly that she doesn't actually expect you to do a damn thing about the situation. She more than likely just wants to unburden herself of the $hit that is scratching at the back of her mind and feel as though her grievances are at least validated, and she turns to you for that because, I presume, she trusts you. She needs your ear for half an hour, that's all. Again, this is a more general point, not specifically directed at you; "not my problem" isn't really acceptable when you're married to someone because her problems are yours, and vice versa. It's much healthier to be compassionate and attentive toward a person who confides in you all the tiny things which grind them down throughout the day and oftentimes make them feel like they're in a scrap. They confide in you these things so that they feel like they're a little bit less alone in that scrap. It's your choice whether any compassion and empathy you're showing towards her is a performance or actually done in earnest, but making an effort towards doing it in earnest is much more beneficial. Some blokes won't tell you this to your face because they're afraid that saying the words, or anything approaching, "maybe you'd both benefit by showing her a bit more patience and love and respect", would make them look and sound like puffters, but it's all true. Take this as a bit of advice from one anonymous bloke on the internet to another. There's no ego at stake here.

Agree with every word. After 47 years marriage I think we understand each other. After 18 years retired I don’t even have to worry about it any longer.

My wife talks about nothing else on the 3 days a week that she does work, and she does it like a Shakespearean actress. Every tone of voice, vocal inflection, hand gesture and facial expression from every social interaction of the day is faithfully repeated, then when she gets to the end she starts again from the beginning.

I learnt early doors how to tune it out.

BenWickes wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 7:10 pm

Oh don't remind me. Wife was furious with me for sleeping with another woman in her dream the other week. Didn't talk to me all day.

It's not just me then .... many years ago, Mrs Clarets4me did the same to me !
I could understand it if a bloke was calling out another woman's name in his sleep, but to cold shoulder you for something you did in their own dream ?? .....

tim_noone wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 11:58 pm

I'm a Bit Sid the sexist...

Surely not ...

It's not worth my life to even comment on this.

Turns out ''what are you going to do about it then'' (to solve some of the problems) is not an acceptable response.

I have managed to make the doghouse very comfortable.

Spiral wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 11:55 pm

Even though...

Of course you're spot on, and its one of the differences between men and women - men will bottle stuff up, women like to unburden themselves. As ClaretEngineer alluded to trying to offer a solution isn't what is required or wanted. The process is to unburden and be there for your good lady as a listener, that is all. Offering solutions is not a good idea UNLESS there is a very specific request for that type of input hence learning how to listen is key to all of this - you'll miss the request and then be in the dog house for NOT helping

It is a skill that comes with age and wisdom

You wanna hear what they say at work when they talk about their weekends at home with us lot!!

https://www.facebook.com/abiclarkecomed ... 117411679/

No thanks.

BTW I would much rather listen to her banging on about work than have her tell me what’s going on in her favourite soap. Not that I have any interest in any of them but it would be quicker to download and watch a complete episode than for her to tell me a 3 minute scene.

I wish I had a girlfriend to tell me about her day at work.

Burnley1989 wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 7:12 pm

What do you prefer to talk about?

What he did at work

Clarets4me wrote: ↑

Fri Jan 15, 2021 9:14 am

Surely not ...

My missus does this but I am more than happy for her to do so because she needs to talk about it otherwise she would crack. She works permanent nights on the, currently, covid wards and is under so much pressure that an hour venting to me a day is nothing.....

ClaretDiver wrote: ↑

Fri Jan 15, 2021 1:43 pm

My missus does this but I am more than happy for her to do so because she needs to talk about it otherwise she would crack. She works permanent nights on the, currently, covid wards and is under so much pressure that an hour venting to me a day is nothing.....

The perfect husband...and named Diver to boot

My partner is a nurse in A&E and I have to sit through very long, painfully detailed stories about her day. Sometimes when she's telling me I realise I've literally not listened to a word she's said for a solid 2 or 3 minutes, it's crazy she doesn't cotton on more.

Then when it's done she'll ask how my day was and the answer is invariably "yeah alright"

my husbands standard reply, when I ask how was work or how was your day is a standard answer, fair to crap, that's it 99% of the time.

Occasionally though he starts to tell me something and I stop what I am doing to listen, because I always think, this must be important, it rarely is but it is clearly something he wanted to tell me about for whatever reason.

Some good advice here regarding just listen, nobody expects you to solve the issue or even understand it.

My wife regularly tells me that I don't listen when she tells me about her day at work. Absolute nonsense. She's still got a great career at Woolworths

BenWickes wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 7:10 pm

Oh don't remind me. Wife was furious with me for sleeping with another woman in her dream the other week. Didn't talk to me all day.

I had exactly the same experience, missus was being a bit off with me, and I didn’t know why, turns out she’d had a vivid dream about me and another woman up to no good, but even though she knew it wasn’t real she couldn’t help hating me a little when she looked at me!
I didn’t do my self any favours when I said I have the same dream, most nights

BleedingClaret wrote: ↑

Fri Jan 15, 2021 6:13 pm

I had exactly the same experience, missus was being a bit off with me, and I didn’t know why, turns out she’d had a vivid dream about me and another woman up to no good, but even though she knew it wasn’t real she couldn’t help hating me a little when she looked at me!
I didn’t do my self any favours when I said I have the same dream, most nights

Must be a sub-conscious thing. Keeley Hawes is kind of my crush (she's about our age) and I get it whenever she's on TV. 'Oh your girlfriend is on' and she gets just that bit edgy with me about it. Like it's ever going to happen in reality.
I'd better be careful what I say who's in my dreams as the wife read this thread last night

Hibsclaret wrote: ↑

Thu Jan 14, 2021 11:25 pm

This begs the question....was the ex one of the ‘you’re not just here to watch brigade’ or was it a more casual acquaintance than that...

Mother of my 2 boys, was the ex I was dreaming about.

BenWickes wrote: ↑

Fri Jan 15, 2021 6:34 pm

Must be a sub-conscious thing. Keeley Hawes is kind of my crush (she's about our age) and I get it whenever she's on TV. 'Oh your girlfriend is on' and she gets just that bit edgy with me about it. Like it's ever going to happen in reality.
I'd better be careful what I say who's in my dreams as the wife read this thread last night

It is definitely good practice to act fairly disinterested when any good looking woman appears in a film or tv series.
They, the other halves, lay traps for you, like she attractive isn’t she, who, her, mmh not really, she’s alright I suppose, not my type really. That’s you love! Is a good rehearsed response
F@ck yeah, I was just thinking I’d like to... is on the other hand not an advised response
I once made the mistake of saying I liked Madeleine Stowe
and when she appeared in an American drama, making a further faux pas by saying I’d like her since the film ‘Stakeout’ with Richard Dreyfus & Emilio Estevez, so half a lifetime crush. The rest of the drama series was a little tense to watch.

BenWickes wrote: ↑

Fri Jan 15, 2021 6:34 pm

Must be a sub-conscious thing. Keeley Hawes is kind of my crush (she's about our age) and I get it whenever she's on TV. 'Oh your girlfriend is on' and she gets just that bit edgy with me about it. Like it's ever going to happen in reality.
I'd better be careful what I say who's in my dreams as the wife read this thread last night

Yep looked up Keeley Hawes, remember her on that bodyguard series and agreeing with the Missus that he wouldn’t be interested in that old bird whilst thinking the exact opposite
I’ll take your Keeley Hawes and raise you a Nigella Lawson

Fixed it