This Forum is the main messageboard to discuss all things Claret and Blue and beyond
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Clarets4me
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by Clarets4me » Mon Aug 21, 2017 6:31 pm
Quote from Sean Dyche...
" I'd twigged towards the end of last season, that Chris Wood was looking to turn over a new leaf. On my part, I didn't want to branch out too far from our system, and Chris was eager to take his bough in the top flight. During a Trunk call to Leeds after our last offer, I realised that they were all bark and no bite, and that Chris was feeling chipper about dovetailing into the group. Yew'll be aware that whilst I've been at the Elm here, transfer fees have been Privet between the two Clubs, but Leeds have ashed us to be plane about it. I'd heard that Forest were interested, because after all, he's carrying no excess timber. Some saps have logged in to " The Beehole End " to accuse me of being " thick as a plank " ! However, that rather goes against the grain and it's only a splinter movement. They will soon see that players like Wood don't grow on Trees !!
I'll get me Coat....

Last edited by
Clarets4me on Mon Aug 21, 2017 11:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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ClaretLoup
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by ClaretLoup » Mon Aug 21, 2017 6:37 pm
Let's hope he stays fit and keeps away from the treetment room.
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Paint it claret
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by Paint it claret » Mon Aug 21, 2017 6:43 pm
You forgot to say he's built like a wardrobe but will be on the bench quite a bit
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DavePTClaret
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by DavePTClaret » Mon Aug 21, 2017 6:49 pm
Paint it claret wrote:You forgot to say he's built like a wardrobe but will be on the bench quite a bit
Well it was thought he'd become a sportsman from a young age, because he was always a tall boy.
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Juan Tanamera
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by Juan Tanamera » Mon Aug 21, 2017 6:51 pm
Leaf it out lads.
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bfccrazy
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by bfccrazy » Mon Aug 21, 2017 6:54 pm
It's an oakcellent signing.
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Clarets4me
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by Clarets4me » Mon Aug 21, 2017 6:54 pm
Will he be denied a debut goal on Wednesday by the proverbial " Coat of Varnish ", I wonder ??
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mdd2
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by mdd2 » Mon Aug 21, 2017 6:55 pm
Only signed for us because of our links with Oak Furniture Land
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HatfieldClaret
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by HatfieldClaret » Mon Aug 21, 2017 7:07 pm
He'll fit right into the groove and have the Rovers defence in knots. Trust me, I saw it in the stars. Acorn y thing to say maybe. If Stan Tenon was our manager still, he wood agree.
Seasons already started but better lathe than never.
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TheFamilyCat
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by TheFamilyCat » Mon Aug 21, 2017 7:13 pm
No more puns please, I'd get sycamore of them.
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Dejavu
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by Dejavu » Mon Aug 21, 2017 7:17 pm
He will be very Poplar with the fans...
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ExistentialWanderer
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by ExistentialWanderer » Mon Aug 21, 2017 7:18 pm
Sean Dyche and Chris were walking through Gawthorpe's beautiful surrounds before signing his contract and Chris piped up. 'You know gaffer, I'm from New Zealand and being from such a beautiful country, we're taught from a young age about the flora and fauna'. 'For instance this is a Dogwood'. 'Wow! Amazing Chris. How do you know that?' Queries the boss. Chris replied 'It's identified by it's bark.'
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evensteadiereddie
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by evensteadiereddie » Mon Aug 21, 2017 7:30 pm
Not root one football, I hope ?
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MACCA
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by MACCA » Mon Aug 21, 2017 10:17 pm
He's a right pine in the arse for defenders, let's hope the commentators label him the "evergreen Chris wood"
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Bertiebeehead
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by Bertiebeehead » Mon Aug 21, 2017 10:18 pm
You're all barking up the wrong tree.
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Willy
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by Willy » Mon Aug 21, 2017 10:23 pm
Can I ash you all to stop?
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dsr
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by dsr » Mon Aug 21, 2017 10:28 pm
B-elm.
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Clarets4me
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by Clarets4me » Mon Aug 21, 2017 10:51 pm
TheFamilyCat wrote:No more puns please, I'd get sycamore of them.
Come on "TheFamilyCat ", not that old Chestnut !
You'll be fine if he helps conker Rovers on Wednesday !!

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Ilkley claret
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by Ilkley claret » Tue Aug 22, 2017 8:05 am
We did once have a player called Andy Wardrobe ( true) when he left my Mum said it was probably because he didn't fit in!
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Claretmatt4
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by Claretmatt4 » Tue Aug 22, 2017 8:07 am
Only issue is with his commitment for me, he's looked like he's been on the beech since we first made out interest known. Let's hope he's still sharp.
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Culmclaret
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by Culmclaret » Tue Aug 22, 2017 10:28 am
Apparently he thrives on wild service
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jojomk1
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by jojomk1 » Tue Aug 22, 2017 11:11 am
Yew lot can't cedar wood from the trees - he's deciduously quick on the ground
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Giftonsnoidea
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by Giftonsnoidea » Tue Aug 22, 2017 11:12 am
Let's hope he's not as shite as Graham Branch!
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kentonclaret
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by kentonclaret » Tue Aug 22, 2017 11:16 am
When Wood scores his first goal Dyche will remark "wonderful finish".
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Steve1956
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by Steve1956 » Tue Aug 22, 2017 11:17 am
Oh dear,old men and jokes.
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BleedingClaret
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by BleedingClaret » Tue Aug 22, 2017 11:21 am
mdd2 wrote:Only signed for us because of our links with Oak Furniture Land
He genuinely must feature in there ad campaign, Only real Wood here etc
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Fretters
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by Fretters » Tue Aug 22, 2017 1:52 pm
Let's hope his mind is on the job and not on the beech.
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Dyched
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by Dyched » Tue Aug 22, 2017 2:04 pm
He's really got a lovely finish on him and isn't shy of the odd chip too. I hope Sean has him well drilled and he can be moldered to fit our style of play. I hope he can screw the ball back and be the glue between midfield and the forward line.
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boiledclaret
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by boiledclaret » Tue Aug 22, 2017 2:52 pm
I'll do the oaky cokey when he scores.
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Walt
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by Walt » Tue Aug 22, 2017 4:52 pm
I jengarally believe he is the finishing touch to our attack. The veneer.
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tiger76
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by tiger76 » Tue Aug 22, 2017 5:04 pm
It's plane to see this is a top drawer signing, we will floor the opposition with this guy.
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morpheus2
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by morpheus2 » Tue Aug 22, 2017 5:13 pm
I hate it when I'm too late to join the pun party and I can't be arsed going through the thread to see if any have been missed

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Giftonsnoidea
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by Giftonsnoidea » Tue Aug 22, 2017 5:37 pm
DYCHE FINALLY GETS WOOD! Screams the LET