Up The Clarets corporate box

[Aclaret]

I've seen my name mentioned on a few threads over the last few days, and I'm getting the sense that there are a fair number of people who would get some sort of satisfaction out of stabbing me. I think if they could do it without repercussion they would take the opportunity to, too, which says far more about them than it does me — me, whose only crime is writing long and admittedly somewhat abrasive posts on a footy forum (the abrasion is for rhetorical effect, you ninnies), and apparently that offends the hard of reading and those who get flustered and frustrated at the fact they can't counterargue in discussions they wilfully enter, and so some people take it out on me that they are themselves stupid, this impotent rage, this furrowed brow, the way they accidentally switch off their phone when they're typing away at me with such sound & fury because they lose their dexterity and squeeze down the power button too hard for too long — this they do because they are apes. Someone will probably even want to stab me for this post. But I'm basically a clown; I aspire to entertain. Mostly myself, it must be said, but others are welcome to laugh at the scene. I love you all, even if I think almost all of you are w@nkers. I can't believe any of you take any of this even remotely seriously. I don't want to sit in your $hitty box. It smells of cheap aftershave and halitosis, and I don't like your brown shoes, and your tucked in shirt with your belly hanging over your blue Wranglers, and your tedious talk of real ale, and your sunburnt neck, and your varifocal glasses, and your hairy hands, and the way you talk about the service staff (you're almost old enough to be her grandfather you perv), and the watch...the godforsaken watch — you aren't going scuba diving, it doesn't need to be waterproof to a depth of 150m, you're going paddling off a beach in fking Portugal, you're not circumnavigating the globe. No, pi$$ off, I wanna be with the coke heads in the CFS. I'm opting out.

Tucked in shirt ( because I'm told to off Mrs AC) belly hanging over my Chinos ( but dieting) I wear Varifocals, I have hairy hands ( not my palms) ....I admire young ladies.....although I may be in your sights Spiral, I don't want to stab you....just give you a big cuddle, like most folks on here.

[bfcjg]

Even the emojis were genuinely shocked.

[Claret knight]

Just renewed my 2 tickets in the clearly interiors longside lounge ,been going in there for the last 3 seasons .This season the cost is £2200.00 + vat per ticket ,the 4 course meals are restaurant class we have to pay our bar bill but as there’s no real ale on i don’t run up a bill ,been going in the Turf since I was 4 in 1966 so I’ve decided I want some comfort in my old age and also treat my son ,there’s no pockets in shrouds and I’d rather give my brass to the clarets rather than the tax man

[ClaretTony]

Just renewed my 2 tickets in the clearly interiors longside lounge ,been going in there for the last 3 seasons .This season the cost is £2200.00 + vat per ticket ,the 4 course meals are restaurant class we have to pay our bar bill but as there’s no real ale on i don’t run up a bill ,been going in the Turf since I was 4 in 1966 so I’ve decided I want some comfort in my old age and also treat my son ,there’s no pockets in shrouds and I’d rather give my brass to the clarets rather than the tax man

Has the quality of food changed in the last year or two at all? Might be different next season too with all the catering outsourced.

[Claret knight]

The foods been the same for the last 3 seasons choice of 2 carvery meals with a great choice of starters then desserts and cheese at half time or vegetarian I’ll have to see how the new levy set up is next season but I’ve heard they have it right at their other venues

[Clarets4me]

Just renewed my 2 tickets in the clearly interiors longside lounge ,been going in there for the last 3 seasons .This season the cost is £2200.00 + vat per ticket ,the 4 course meals are restaurant class we have to pay our bar bill but as there’s no real ale on i don’t run up a bill ,been going in the Turf since I was 4 in 1966 so I’ve decided I want some comfort in my old age and also treat my son ,there’s no pockets in shrouds and I’d rather give my brass to the clarets rather than the tax man

Wonderful way of looking at life ... I'm sure your son will long remember these times !

On my last Birthday ( 59 ), Mrs Clarets4me booked a table for 10 at Blackburn Rugby Club ( Burnley were away ), apart from the two of us, were our oldest friends, my son, daughter in law & granddaughter ( in a high chair ), my best man from 33 years ago and his wife and two old Rugby friends. Towards the end of the day, I was sitting chatting to a couple of my former team mates, now in their late 60's, when my wife kissed my on the top of my head and whispered " You're in your " happy place " ! ", I had to concur ...

[dandeclaret]

Was in the one next door on Monday, think it’s called the centenary lounge. Hospitality setup was modern and smart, atmosphere was good. Food was locally themed, I had soup, gastro pub style pie and chips, sticky toffee pudding. Cheese and biscuits, and teas and coffee at half time.

Small enough and personable, with good outdoor seats… usual roof problems not withstanding.

Service a little slow, but in line with most hospitality settings I’ve attended over the last couple of years.

People I was with seemed to enjoy it as well, and a few have said they would do it again.

[Claret Till I Die]

Was in the one next door on Monday, think it’s called the centenary lounge. Hospitality setup was modern and smart, atmosphere was good. Food was locally themed, I had soup, gastro pub style pie and chips, sticky toffee pudding. Cheese and biscuits, and teas and coffee at half time.

Small enough and personable, with good outdoor seats… usual roof problems not withstanding.

Service a little slow, but in line with most hospitality settings I’ve attended over the last couple of years.

People I was with seemed to enjoy it as well, and a few have said they would do it again.

How big a step up from the 1882 lounge since your last appearance was it ?

[dandeclaret]

How big a step up from the 1882 lounge since your last appearance was it ?

Big step up…. They do a better job of keeping the riff raf out…. Smart casual, no easy jet uniforms

[Claret Till I Die]

Big step up…. They do a better job of keeping the riff raf out…. Smart casual, no easy jet uniforms

What about the Gareth Taylor stragglers?

[ClaretInLeeds]

What about the Gareth Taylor stragglers?

[dandeclaret]

What about the Gareth Taylor stragglers?

They’d put a nice picture of him, hanging in the air, winning the header, right behind our table….. it’s the little touches that make a difference. Doo wah diddy….

[Croydon Claret]

I treated my dad to a ticket in the Clearly Interiors lounge on Monday. His first game this season due to ill health.

Never been a fan of the hospitality packages before, having previously only bought them at away games due to being unable to buy a regular ticket. You do feel terribly disconnected from the Burnley fans and, whilst the meal is nice, you'd rather be in amongst the crowd.

The situation at Turf Moor couldn't be more different though. The catering was excellent and we were treated so well upon arrival and made to feel like valued customers.

Being able to take a seat in the main stand made all the difference, especially the extra comfortable seat. My dad initially wanted to just watch through the glass but temptation got the better of him. Just felt like the normal match atmosphere but with lots of pluses and no negatives.

Not cheap at £200 a head but for the limited times I'm back in in Burnley I think I'll be treating myself to it more often.

[miele-man]

About 1% of this board would pay 200 quid for a game

I would pay , although as it was my idea I would expect special treatment

[Tribesmen]

I treated my dad to a ticket in the Clearly Interiors lounge on Monday. His first game this season due to ill health.

Never been a fan of the hospitality packages before, having previously only bought them at away games due to being unable to buy a regular ticket. You do feel terribly disconnected from the Burnley fans and, whilst the meal is nice, you'd rather be in amongst the crowd.

The situation at Turf Moor couldn't be more different though. The catering was excellent and we were treated so well upon arrival and made to feel like valued customers.

Being able to take a seat in the main stand made all the difference, especially the extra comfortable seat. My dad initially wanted to just watch through the glass but temptation got the better of him. Just felt like the normal match atmosphere but with lots of pluses and no negatives.

Fair play CC , enjoy life while you can

Not cheap at £200 a head but for the limited times I'm back in in Burnley I think I'll be treating myself to it more often.

[Tribesmen]

Errrrr i was going to say enjoy life CC but came up blank

[Croydon Claret]

Errrrr i was going to say enjoy life CC but came up blank

I figured it out on amongst the quote

Cheers

[Casper2]

Just renewed my 2 tickets in the clearly interiors longside lounge ,been going in there for the last 3 seasons .This season the cost is £2200.00 + vat per ticket ,the 4 course meals are restaurant class we have to pay our bar bill but as there’s no real ale on i don’t run up a bill ,been going in the Turf since I was 4 in 1966 so I’ve decided I want some comfort in my old age and also treat my son ,there’s no pockets in shrouds and I’d rather give my brass to the clarets rather than the tax man

£2,200 is that for the season?

[Volvoclaret]

Can you pay on the gate?