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Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:21 pm
by bfcjg
Who actually cares about a load of foreign students racing for the glory of an elitist university?
I would suggest small mines and a few sharks perhaps a shoal of piranhas anything to make it more fun and family friendly.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:27 pm
by chekhov
Goal music.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:29 pm
by Leisure
Row with 1 hand tied behind their back!
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:31 pm
by Ashingtonclaret46
All row on the same side of the boat.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:32 pm
by onewillieirvine
Put an engine on the boats, that should shorten the epic event

Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:33 pm
by bfcjg
Blinfold them and get the Cox pi22ed.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:33 pm
by ElectroClaret
They should all be forced to get p!ssed beforehand.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:44 pm
by ElectroClaret
Cambridge bossing it.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:49 pm
by Tribesmen
Bridge dumping , sure if the England fans can do it in Holland they can do it at home ?
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 5:49 pm
by bfcjg
Icebergs.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 6:14 pm
by chekhov
I was encouraged to like it back in the 70's as a kid as my more intelligent elder brother was at Cambridge.
Because it was my tendency to try to please I decided to be enthusiastic and to cheer on the Cambridge crew with the rest of the family.
It was only relatively recently that the veil lifted, and I realised what had happened.
Now I think it's the most tedious and pointless sporting event that existed. Who gives a f*** is my perspective.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 6:18 pm
by Dark Cloud
They're not even the 2 best teams in Britain!
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 6:46 pm
by TractorFace
Mine would be boat race to reflect the social order of things in our country.
The coxswains would be the only elitist ones there, but they would have to be proper old moneyed toffs, not the nouveau riche who pretend to fit in with the well-bred gentry. They would also have whips to make their working class crews row faster.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 6:48 pm
by ian
A couple of jet engines should do it.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 6:52 pm
by tim_noone
Topless cox be it male or female. I'm not prepared to discriminate over a pair of big t!ts but would hope it's the latter!

Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 6:56 pm
by FactualFrank
I was cheering for Oxford Analytica.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 6:57 pm
by karatekid
Put a small hole in the boats and they have to get to the finish line before it sinks.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 7:09 pm
by Dark Cloud
Have loads of universities enter and make it a knockout.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 7:15 pm
by blsclaret
Whoever beat Oxford in the semi-final must be rubbish
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 7:25 pm
by ElectroClaret
Get the Venkys to organise it.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 7:27 pm
by BarstewardsEnquiry
Cross river traffic, preferably a gunboat
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 7:45 pm
by ClaretEngineer
A re-enactment of the St Nazaire raid. With the finish line in St Nazaire.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 7:51 pm
by pushpinpussy
I think this would make it more popular.
Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race in 1977
Ah, isn't that nice.. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 8:05 pm
by elwaclaret
Give each team a trebuchet and lighted balls of Greek fire to use against the other team. Boarding parties with cutlasses would also add to the spectacle.... and the losers have to go down with the boat.
Then I'd watch.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 8:17 pm
by Awayfromburnley
It's an absolute flipping nonsense. I went to Leeds uni and each year we had a run, not quite the same athelticism required but it was called the Otley run. Now if they filmed that I personally guarantee it would get higher viewing figures. Carnage. With no halfwit over indulged toffs involved. (well there was this posh bird called Louise, but let's not go there....)
If we mixed the boat race with the police pursuit to those that tried to steal the fixed bridge cameras, with live ammunition, it would be immense....
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 8:21 pm
by box_of_frogs
Loved doing the Otley Run. I was quite good at it if I do say do myself.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 8:25 pm
by Mrpotatohead
Cannons.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 8:48 pm
by gawthorpe_view
Make them stop part way through to pick some refugees out of the water.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 9:09 pm
by Paul Waine
The rowers, both male and female, train for 7 months for this one race. Would it be more interesting if we followed their training sessions every morning through winter?
And, how about all the "competition" and "to-ing and fro-ing" that goes on in the weeks approaching the race when the members of the 8s are being selected and de-selected.
Plus there have been a few occasions when "emotions" have got out of control. I think at least one example of rebellion and walking (or should that be rowing?) out amongst the crews. (Wasn't that turned into a film....?).
So, if you like X Factor, if you like Strictly, if you like Bake Off.... I now introduce you to "Strictly X Concept IIs" with a live Final on the Thames. (Maybe the name needs a little work on it).
Nah, you are right, it's hard to make a boat race interesting.

Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 9:42 pm
by dpinsussex
Wave machine
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 9:42 pm
by JohnMac
The BBC mentioned 'State Schools' about a dozen times in the first 10 minutes trying to create the impression anyone can get involved.
It's being dropped from next year in order to show the Fenn Street versus Grange Hill Boat Race on the Grand Union Canal.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 9:54 pm
by boiledclaret
bfcjg wrote: get the Cox pi22ed.
Make sure you go before you get in the boat. Otherwise stand up and do it over the side.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sat Mar 24, 2018 9:56 pm
by bfcjg
Disolving oars.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 12:13 am
by MACCA
Ideas to liven up the boat race?
Turn over!
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 12:23 am
by deanothedino
karatekid wrote:Put a small hole in the boats and they have to get to the finish line before it sinks.
+1
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 12:29 am
by Dyched
Have 8 coxing and 1 rowing.
Or just torpedo the *****
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 12:38 am
by BarstewardsEnquiry
bfcjg wrote:Disolving oars.

Genius
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 12:48 am
by LoveCurryPies
Torpedoes.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 12:51 am
by FactualFrank
Difficult to tell whether you're taking the Michael.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 4:11 am
by Clarets4me
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 7:45 am
by Cleveleys_claret
Each team should have 1 wheelchair bound person on the boat
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 9:31 am
by Woonderbah
Rocky cruising alongside with a megaphone
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 10:46 am
by kentonclaret
Give the men a 2 minutes head start before Clare Balding sets off in pursuit on a jet ski.

Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 11:04 am
by martin_p
That 3-0 win over West Ham livened up my boat race.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 11:10 am
by Firthy
Just don't watch it. Probably more excitement listening to the radio.
Re: Ideas to liven up the boat race.
Posted: Sun Mar 25, 2018 12:10 pm
by bfcjg
And if they didn't fanny around like modern day Captain Pugwashes they would have more Nobel Prize winners than France and USA combined.
