Dog poo in my garden

pushpinpussy · Post by **pushpinpussy** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:40 pm

Got home from work and found two dog turds in my front garden. I don't have any pets. Does anyone know of any deterrents to stop dogs using my garden as a toilet, given that most dog owners have no sense of decency.

Claretuk · Post by **Claretuk** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:42 pm

Put a fence n gate up?

paulatky · Post by **paulatky** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:42 pm

A shotgun,aimed at the owners.

Bin Ont Turf · Post by **Bin Ont Turf** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:42 pm

Fencing and a gate.

bedfords · Post by **bedfords** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:43 pm

Most do. Fence or wall could help depending on size of both and dog/s in question.

Rileybobs · Post by **Rileybobs** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:45 pm

I never pick my dog's poo up from people's front or rear gardens because unlike some people I have common decency and don't like to trespass.

pushpinpussy · Post by **pushpinpussy** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:46 pm

i live on a very busy main road. they are coming in through my drive way. electric gates i assume would cost a fortune.

Vintage Claret · Post by **Vintage Claret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 4:50 pm

Find out where the dog owners live and have a huge dump on their front lawn (preferably while reading a newspaper which can be used as toilet paper once you are done)

South West Claret. · Post by **South West Claret.** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:00 pm

Vintage Claret wrote:Find out where the dog owners live and have a huge dump on their front lawn (preferably while reading a newspaper which can be used as toilet paper once you are done)

Bit extreme isn’t it...it’s only crap you know think of it as free fertiliser

SalisburyClaret · Post by **SalisburyClaret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:10 pm

I'd suggest obtaining a cat

Damo · Post by **Damo** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:12 pm

With all of the money Burnley players get paid, you wouldn't expect one of them to live on a busy main road

tim_noone · Post by **tim_noone** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:13 pm

SalisburyClaret wrote:I'd suggest obtaining a cat

Not novichok?

Dyched · Post by **Dyched** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:21 pm

Id suggest tasting it. That way you can rule out if it’s human. If it is a gate/fence won’t do. You’ll need some kind of cage.

Steve1956 · Post by **Steve1956** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:33 pm

Just drive a post into your front lawn and hang some dog shite bags on it,I'm sure all the responsible dog owners will take a bag and clean up the shite,but then again they would probably hang the bag full of shite from one of the trees in your garden

South West Claret. · Post by **South West Claret.** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:36 pm

Steve1956 wrote:Just drive a post into your front lawn and hang some dog shite bags on it,I'm sure all the responsible dog owners will take a bag and clean up the shite,but then again they would probably hang the bag full of shite from one of the trees in your garden

...or simply back on the post as it will save them walking further.

Healeywoodclaret · Post by **Healeywoodclaret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:38 pm

Put a sign up outside your drive Trespassers will be shot survivors will be shot again. Now p*ss off and take your dog with you!

Steve1956 · Post by **Steve1956** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:38 pm

South West Claret. wrote:...or simply back on the post as it will save them walking further.

CoolClaret · Post by **CoolClaret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 5:48 pm

Sorry mate I couldn't hold it any longer!

conyoviejo · Post by **conyoviejo** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 6:24 pm

pushpinpussy wrote:i live on a very busy main road. they are coming in through my drive way. electric gates i assume would cost a fortune.

Cattle Grid ..

Marney&Mee · Post by **Marney&Mee** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 6:42 pm

Told a tale on you

ŽižkovClaret · Post by **ŽižkovClaret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 6:48 pm

Thought this was UB40's comeback single!

Millertime v1.7 · Post by **Millertime v1.7** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 6:59 pm

Pushpinpussy.
Mate.
Do you want these clarets to hold your hand and guide you through this life? Or are you capable of making your own decisions? Listen bud, I've been through the ringer with dons fans on our board, I've had enough of them asking questions that can easily be found elsewhere or by using simple common sense.

pushpinpussy · Post by **pushpinpussy** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:00 pm

Millertime v1.7 wrote:Pushpinpussy.
Mate.
Do you want these clarets to hold your hand and guide you through this life? Or are you capable of making your own decisions? Listen bud, I've been through the ringer with dons fans on our board, I've had enough of them asking questions that can easily be found elsewhere or by using simple common sense.

so what do you suggest. thank for your advice so far

ŽižkovClaret · Post by **ŽižkovClaret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:06 pm

pushpinpussy wrote:so what do you suggest. thank for your advice so far

Burnley hosepipe

dermotdermot · Post by **dermotdermot** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:07 pm

SalisburyClaret wrote:I'd suggest obtaining a cat

And what good, pray tell, would that do? They are far worse than dogs when it comes to indiscriminately shiting all over other people’s gardens.

Jakubclaret · Post by **Jakubclaret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:11 pm

Rileybobs wrote:I never pick my dog's poo up from people's front or rear gardens because unlike some people I have common decency and don't like to trespass.

I think the whole idea is to avoid the occurrence of dog excrement in the first place, so then the potential issue of trespass would be a non entity.

duncandisorderly · Post by **duncandisorderly** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:15 pm

Firstly; most dog owners do have a sense of decency

Secondly; do you have any enemies?

Thirdly; Cattle grid is by far the best way to stop dogs. They hate it. Cattle grid your entire garden and you won't have this problem. Sheep hate it too. And pigs. Not sure about cows though. The name suggests they might like it, but not hundred percent on that.

Fifthly; I can't count to four.

bfcjg · Post by **bfcjg** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:35 pm

You can get a dog deterent that operates via a PIR
and sends out a high pitch whine only audible to dogs that they hate and won't go near.
Deaf dogs though could walk up p1ss on it then defecate on the lawn regardless. Your risk

Siddo · Post by **Siddo** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:53 pm

Just an observation that you don't see many dogs roaming off the lead on a busy main road.
Has it just started happening or is it a frequent visit?

Burnleyareback2 · Post by **Burnleyareback2** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:56 pm

The long awaited follow up to “lipstick on my collar”

Wile E Coyote · Post by **Wile E Coyote** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 7:59 pm

you could try putting a sign up

"NO DOG SH** "

taio · Post by **taio** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:00 pm

Wile E Coyote wrote:you could try putting a sign up

"NO DOG SH** "

Dogs can't read.

tim_noone · Post by **tim_noone** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:03 pm

Siddo wrote:Just an observation that you don't see many dogs roaming off the lead on a busy main road.
Has it just started happening or is it a frequent visit?

It'll be LongtimeLurcher

tim_noone · Post by **tim_noone** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:03 pm

taio wrote:Dogs can't read.

NRC · Post by **NRC** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:17 pm

I can’t believe this thread has reached #35 before someone asks......

... is it white?

boatshed bill · Post by **boatshed bill** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:18 pm

Lion's p!$$, that will stop them.

IanMcL · Post by **IanMcL** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:25 pm

Ammonia

Marney&Mee · Post by **Marney&Mee** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:28 pm

Burnleyareback2 wrote:The long awaited follow up to “lipstick on my collar”

I'll tee them up burnleyareback2, you just plagiarise it

Burnleyareback2 · Post by **Burnleyareback2** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:37 pm

Marney&Mee wrote:I'll tee them up burnleyareback2, you just plagiarise it

I didn’t see your comment, I saw the thread title and got so excited I just posted - wrecklessly, I might add.

Your reply did bring a further smile to my face on a long train journey.

Good job

ŽižkovClaret · Post by **ŽižkovClaret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:38 pm

NRC wrote:I can’t believe this thread has reached #35 before someone asks......

... is it white?

#Can'taskthatthesedays

Millertime v1.7 · Post by **Millertime v1.7** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:39 pm

bfcjg wrote:You can get a dog deterent that operates via a PIR
and sends out a high pitch whine only audible to dogs that they hate and won't go near.
Deaf dogs though could walk up p1ss on it then defecate on the lawn regardless. Your risk

Yes because such devices really work for mice. APPALLING advice.
ATROCIOUS.
This is why I suggested pinpussy seek information from more reliable sources than terrace chanting salt of the earth 'oi oi top of the morning to you' punters.

South West Claret. · Post by **South West Claret.** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:41 pm

...What’s that in English.

Billy Balfour · Post by **Billy Balfour** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:45 pm

Dog poo in my garden?

I bet you wouldn't be moaning so much if it was white dog poo in your garden. You know what - you'd be bragging about it.

tim_noone · Post by **tim_noone** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:49 pm

Billy Balfour wrote:Dog poo in my garden?

I bet you wouldn't be moaning so much if it was white dog poo in your garden. You know what - you'd be bragging about it.

Could be truffles?

bfcjg · Post by **bfcjg** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:51 pm

Millertime v1.7 wrote:Yes because such devices really work for mice. APPALLING advice.
ATROCIOUS.
This is why I suggested pinpussy seek information from more reliable sources than terrace chanting salt of the earth 'oi oi top of the morning to you' punters.

Well at least that's one member of the animal kingdom that won't crap on the lawn.
PS are you mental ?

karatekid · Post by **karatekid** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 8:57 pm

Get a dog that is bigger than the sh1tty one , starve it and chain it to a post in your garden with just enough slack to patrol the perimeter.

Aclaret · Post by **Aclaret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 9:02 pm

If you have read any posts of Millertime v1.7 you would realise he has " issues" probably caused by Morag an old flame, he just needs time.

tim_noone · Post by **tim_noone** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 9:13 pm

Aclaret wrote:If you have read any posts of Millertime v1.7 you would realise he has " issues" probably caused by Morag an old flame, he just needs time in a padded cell.

ŽižkovClaret · Post by **ŽižkovClaret** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 9:14 pm

pushpinpussy wrote:Got home from work and found two dog turds in my front garden. I don't have any pets. Does anyone know of any deterrents to stop dogs using my garden as a toilet, given that most dog owners have no sense of decency.

Shhh keep your voice down or they'll all want one!

Millertime v1.7 · Post by **Millertime v1.7** » Wed Sep 19, 2018 9:22 pm

Aclaret don't talk about Morag. Last seen walking arm in arm with rumps at Dundee’s new v&a museum on Saturday. Tup not been seen since August.