I’ve just been out for a walk with the family. Had a cup of coffee and my other half had a scone and jam with her drink. In the past I would have left the half used jar of tiptree jam but today I put it in my pocket for later. Is this a sign of things to come?

I hope you put the lid back on

You will be stealing the HP sauce and Heinz ketchup sachets next from Wetherspoons!

Not being able to get up for the walk is a little bit of a sign, I always take the jam.

The wife said she knew I was getting old because every time I get up out the chair I start with the ooh my back, my legs.

I fart with gusto these days,don't even try and disguise it or hold it in until I can evacuate the said fart outside.

Jamesy wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 12:58 pm

You will be stealing the HP sauce and Heinz ketchup sachets next from Wetherspoons!

And the salt & pepper thingys.
You can never have too many of those.

I am 78 years young today, at the start of this season i was only 68.Have aged 10 years watching the Clarets this season lol.

The Enclosure wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 1:39 pm

I am 78 years young today, at the start of this season i was only 68.Have aged 10 years watching the Clarets this season lol.

Happy birthday.

You know you’re getting old when you start collecting sticks of wood in case you ever need one to stir something

Jammy B@rstew@rd

You forget were you parked the car and spend ages looking for it on the multi storey car park.

Getting old is saying “I’m not paying that for a bloody scone and a blob of jam!”

Jamesy wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 12:58 pm

You will be stealing the HP sauce and Heinz ketchup sachets next from Wetherspoons!

That’s a bit awkward. Banny’s charge for ketchup and mayonnaise
sachets. I’ve been taking the unused ones home that my children don’t use for a long time. Don’t know why it’s taken me so long to do the same with the jar of jam. I suppose it was because it was half used whereas the sachets are unopened.

Buxtonclaret wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 1:38 pm

And the salt & pepper thingys.
You can never have too many of those.

Napkins, you can't have too many Napkins.

Cabbage wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 12:39 pm

I’ve just been out for a walk with the family. Had a cup of coffee and my other half had a scone and jam with her drink. In the past I would have left the half used jar of tiptree jam but today I put it in my pocket for later. Is this a sign of things to come?

It’s a sign you’ll be having jam on toast for breakfast at some point this week….

TheOriginalLongsider wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 1:43 pm

You know you’re getting old when you start collecting sticks of wood in case you ever need one to stir something

November 6th early morning, them rocket sticks are brilliant.

Went to Harrogate Town yesterday. Everyone in front of me was frisked on the way in. Came to my turn, the steward waved me through with the words, “there you go old fella”
I am only 67

bfcjg wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 1:36 pm

I fart with gusto these days,don't even try and disguise it or hold it in until I can evacuate the said fart outside.

You’ll stop that when you start following through.

claret wizard wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 3:24 pm

You’ll stop that when you start following through.

I have and it hasn't

The Enclosure wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 1:39 pm

I am 78 years young today, at the start of this season i was only 68.Have aged 10 years watching the Clarets this season lol.

Happy Birthday The Enclosure, I join you later next week. (same young age). The clarets got you a Birthday point today.

strayclaret wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 3:03 pm

Went to Harrogate Town yesterday. Everyone in front of me was frisked on the way in. Came to my turn, the steward waved me through with the words, “there you go old fella”
I am only 67

I have frequently been thinking I might go watch Harrogate play. It’s only 25 mins from Wetherby.

You know you are old when you used to go out for beer, now you go out for coffee

Always try and acquire 2/3 salt sachets and a 7g pat of butter, before boarding a long flight .... I've never yet had an " in-flight " meal that hasn't benefited from extra salt, or butter on the potatoes/rice etc ....
I'm 58 but have been doing this for at least 20 years ...

bfcjg wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 1:50 pm

You forget were you parked the car and spend ages looking for it on the multi storey car park.

About thirty years ago,I wasn’t even old, I was in Liverpool on business and had parked on the Albert Dock (think it was free then). I came back and spent twenty minutes looking for my car and thinking ‘bloody scousers’ before I found it. I’d just bought a new car and had been looking for the old one. A prophesy of things to come.

Going up stairs and forgetting why half way up.
Going out in the car and getting half way to work before realising that your wife is with you and it’s Sunday.
Groaning when you get up and wondering exactly when you turned into your dad.
Seeing a couple with kids and thinking the parents are wagging off school.
Having to sit down to put your shoes on.
Having no fear of a policeman because a 12 year old isn’t scary.
Seeing a couple of young girls smiling at you and then realising you’re not ‘in there’ they are just being kind.
Oddly, and this maybe a lifestyle thing, but I actually cannot remember the last time I had a hangover, and it’s not for lack of trying.

You start checking out pre paid funeral plans.

claret wizard wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 3:24 pm

You’ll stop that when you start following through.

Followed through last week for the first time ever. Nothing major but thankfully I was only in garden.
Wouldn't wanna do that on a hot date tbh.

The Enclosure wrote: ↑

Sun Jan 23, 2022 1:39 pm

I am 78 years young today, at the start of this season i was only 68.Have aged 10 years watching the Clarets this season lol.

On the plus side only another 15 games til your 100

Just reached 63 on Saturday and enjoying reading this thread (classic). I’m afraid I tick most of the boxes. I’ve got a penchant for saving empty cardboard boxes and containers which usually arrive bearing gifts from Amazon/ eBay etc. they are ceremonially placed up in loft “just in case they come in useful”. I’ll bear in mind the above comments regarding farting. All sounds a bit concerning this old age thing.

bfcjg wrote: ↑

Mon Jan 24, 2022 7:49 am

You start checking out pre paid funeral plans.

Almost did this on Friday. I (73 yo) got a flyer through the door promoting one such & in stead of putting it immediately in recycling I brought it to the living room for future perusal. On Saturday, I thankfully thought better of it and dumped it without reading. Phew.

I've also managed to cut out the groaning when I get a muscle/ joint slight discomfort when getting out of chair/sitting etc. In truth I'm relatively free of such aggravations and it was becoming just an unattractive habit not much warranted.

I'm a big empty box collector though. I have a bit of a shoe fetish (all leather, made in Northants) and have accumulated a world of empty shoe boxes that "will come in useful for something sometime".

Also got to the point where I won't renew certain things (crockery/cutlery/tools etc) because I wont last long enough to get the full value from the purchases so Ill just stick with the old ones.

When you notice a grey haired old lady as you board the bus who immediately stands up and offers you her seat.

Post-it-notes all over the house!

Testing

Went for a a swim at our local Leisure Centre with one of my sons. I am 74 but look 21. The cashier looked at my son and asked if he was my 'carer' as he could then get in for free!

Later went for a haircut and the barber did not even ask my age but automatically gave me a pensioner discount. Am I misleading the signs?

On one occasion, not too long ago, I found the basket of clothes pegs in the fridge....

As for the groaning and sighing when getting out of chair etc ....I started doing this about 6 years ago, after about 18 months, Mrs Clarets4me declared " it's like living with an old man " and made various other obsevations. After a few weeks of her " wise council ", I booked in to see my GP who referred me to get my hips and knees X-rayed ! The follow-up appointment was scheduled and she announced, " I'm coming with you, I never get a right tale from you " ..

We duly sat down at the surgery and the two hip X-rays were duly pinned on the " light board " .... the good Doctor " My God, how the hell have you not presented here with pain symptoms before, these are as bad as I've seen in someone your age, you must have been creased with pain ... were you just trying to put a brave face on it ? " Mrs Clarets4me was uncharacteristically quiet as he referred me to the pain management clinic, and also to orthopedics for two new hips The subsequent silence continued until we got back in the car, " You never said it was that bad ! ", she muttered ... " I tried to tell you, my darling, but you wouldn't listen " I replied resignedly ... I milked that for weeks, I can tell you !

I'm happily now in receipt of two new hips, the latest on 2nd December last, being rather delayed by Covid etc but much better.

claret59 wrote: ↑

Mon Jan 24, 2022 12:22 pm

Went for a a swim at our local Leisure Centre with one of my sons. I am 74 but look 21. The cashier looked at my son and asked if he was my 'carer' as he could then get in for free!

Later went for a haircut and the barber did not even ask my age but automatically gave me a pensioner discount. Am I misleading the signs?

You are 74 but think that you look 21?

A visit to SpecSavers perhaps

I went to pick up a prescription and offered to pay and the young chemist said it was free . I was confused until she said I was 60 and it’s free . I was bamboozled between joy at saving 8 quid and realising I was officially old.

What used to take me 3 minutes, now takes 30.

Dixie Normous wrote: ↑

Mon Jan 24, 2022 5:39 pm

I went to pick up a prescription and offered to pay and the young chemist said it was free . I was confused until she said I was 60 and it’s free . I was bamboozled between joy at saving 8 quid and realising I was officially old.

Eight quid? It must have been a long time since you paid for a prescription?

Ps make the most of your free prescriptions as this inept government are proposing to charge over 60’s again for prescriptions come April of this year.

5 months and counting trying to recover from an Achilles strain, including 2 months trying to play through it, is making me feel old at the tender age of 54

The font on your Kindle gets bigger.

bfcjg wrote: ↑

Mon Jan 24, 2022 6:27 pm

The font on your Kindle gets bigger.

Yesterday on the coach on the way back from Arsenal Someone said why don’t you get a braille one cos of the size of the text on my phone

70.
and apart from the things that are going wrong with me I'm OK

When faced with the alternative, it's preferred.

Jamesy wrote: ↑

Mon Jan 24, 2022 6:04 pm

Ps make the most of your free prescriptions as this inept government are proposing to charge over 60’s again for prescriptions come April of this year.

I was worried about this until I checked the details.

I won't be affected,. They are proposing to push the qualifying age up to the new pension age, i.e. 66. I'm 70 later this year.

I now make a weird noise getting in and out of the car... I'm seriously considering getting a SUV next so it'll be easier getting in and out. 20 years ago I had a Lotus Elise and no problems getting in and out.

Love this thread. The free prescription post made me smile, as I was surprised to be in receipt of a free prescription two years ago. However, I know I’m not old as I’m fit and active (Squash/gym/swimming etc), but then again…I look at my lovely big screen telly and it is playing a YouTube video of a log fire