• What actually constitutes “respect” ?

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 12:00 pm**

Self explanatory question.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 12:01 pm**

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FOUqQt3Kg0

edit - other definitions are available.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 12:20 pm**

https://youtu.be/x34icYC8zA0

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 12:51 pm**

When you agree with me.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:18 pm**

Dress in as much black as possible.
Head always bowed.
Eyes never raised above mid point
Voice spoken quietly, slowly in deep, almost whispered tones.
Most importantly, an attitude showing that you know your place.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:28 pm**

Shooting or stabbing fellow teenagers or fellow young men gets you respect in some quarters.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:36 pm**

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" is a good starting reference.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:38 pm**

cblantfanclub wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 12:00 pm
Self explanatory question.

The fact you have felt it necessary to ask is worrying.
It means we of the older generation have failed in our duty to teach you.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:44 pm**

Considering his username, I doubt that 'cblantfanclub' is particularly young.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:49 pm**

About a month ago, my Wife and I caught a tram into town (Manchester), I was amazed at the number of adults standing whilst 5 to 15 year olds occupied seats often with their parents present.
You were taught never to answer a policeman, teacher or anyone in authority back.
Speak only when spoken to.
Respect your elders, listen to them and learn from them. Let people in shops come out before you go in. Hold a door open, especially for a lady. Surrender your seat for a lady.

I could go on. It is all taught from an early age.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:54 pm**

My pet hate at the moment is being called 'mate'.

If I don't know somebody's name I call them Sir or young man.

I bite their ear off if they call me mate.
' not a problem', well actually it is a f**king problem, otherwise I wouldn't be bringing it to your attention, you condescending p**ck. I think I took him by surprise.

My manners suddenly left me.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:56 pm**

2 Bee Holed wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:54 pm
My pet hate at the moment is being called 'mate'.

If I don't know somebody's name I call them Sir or young man.

I bite their ear off if they call me mate.
' not a problem', well actually it is a f**king problem, otherwise I wouldn't be bringing it to your attention, you condescending p**ck. I think I took him by surprise.

My manners suddenly left me.

but if someone called me young man i would also find that condescending

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:59 pm**

2 Bee Holed wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:54 pm
My pet hate at the moment is being called 'mate'.

Don't come to Australia mate.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 2:04 pm**

GordonvaleClaret wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:59 pm
Don't come to Australia mate.

Lived and worked there for a year. I found it quite endearing there. Furthermore, for a bunch of convicts, I found it quite polite and one of the more friendly names I had.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 2:05 pm**

pushpinpussy wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:56 pm
but if someone called me young man i would also find that condescending

I alright, mate.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 2:08 pm**

pushpinpussy wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:56 pm
but if someone called me young man i would also find that condescending

The condescending bit was him telling me something was 'not a problem', when actually to me it was a problem.

Not the use of the term mate, that I just find rude, showing bad manners and disrespectful.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 2:10 pm**

For the yoof contributors he means respeck innit.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 2:29 pm**

2 Bee Holed wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 2:08 pm
The condescending bit was him telling me something was 'not a problem', when actually to me it was a problem.

Not the use of the term mate, that I just find rude, showing bad manners and disrespectful.

I wouldn't let it bother you, pal.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 2:30 pm**

my wife's diary states i don't respect her

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 2:54 pm**

Knowing that folk are a collection of their own life experiences and that their interpretations are subjective and are based on those experiences. Treat them with dignity or walk away if that’s difficult.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 5:32 pm**

2 Bee Holed wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:49 pm
About a month ago, my Wife and I caught a tram into town (Manchester), I was amazed at the number of adults standing whilst 5 to 15 year olds occupied seats often with their parents present.
You were taught never to answer a policeman, teacher or anyone in authority back.
Speak only when spoken to.
Respect your elders, listen to them and learn from them. Let people in shops come out before you go in. Hold a door open, especially for a lady. Surrender your seat for a lady.

I could go on. It is all taught from an early age.

Old women are the worst for not holding doors and failing to even acknowledge, yet alone say thanks, to those who hold doors open for them. The manners of old people just aren't what they used to be

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 5:41 pm**

2 Bee Holed wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:49 pm
About a month ago, my Wife and I caught a tram into town (Manchester), I was amazed at the number of adults standing whilst 5 to 15 year olds occupied seats often with their parents present.
You were taught never to answer a policeman, teacher or anyone in authority back.
Speak only when spoken to.
Respect your elders, listen to them and learn from them. Let people in shops come out before you go in. Hold a door open, especially for a lady. Surrender your seat for a lady.

I could go on. It is all taught from an early age.

I have to say though, I find the older generation some of the rudest people you will meet at times, I’ve opened doors, said hello, smiled, just to be ignored.
My mrs pointed it out at the airport recently, the ones being hard work and rude to staff were aged 60+.
We got the bus from the plane to the terminal building and not one person stood up for a lady with a baby, all just looked at the floor.
I’d certainly not write off the elderly when having a dig at the younger generation.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 5:45 pm**

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x34icYC ... 2KjB4oSJEQ

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 5:47 pm**

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A134hSh ... 2KjB4oSJEQ

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 5:51 pm**

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YWLMnX8F45M

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 6:06 pm**

2 Bee Holed wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:54 pm
My pet hate at the moment is being called 'mate'.

If I don't know somebody's name I call them Sir or young man.

I bite their ear off if they call me mate.
' not a problem', well actually it is a f**king problem, otherwise I wouldn't be bringing it to your attention, you condescending p**ck. I think I took him by surprise.

My manners suddenly left me.

Any money, you’re a bigger prick than he was mate

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 6:11 pm**

Lot of tosh on this thread. Older people have always thought the new youngest generation are unfathomably rude and disrespectful compared to ‘their’ day; it’s always been self-assuring, arrogant rubbish.

Lots of old people are rude and inconsiderate, many young people are kind and respectful, the opposite is also true. This was the case 20, 30, 50 and 100 years ago, too.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 6:31 pm**

Children nowadays are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannise their teachers. Socrates, circa 425 B. C.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 6:35 pm**

Billy Balfour wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 6:31 pm
Children nowadays are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannise their teachers. Socrates, circa 425 B. C.

Had a very philosophical view that Socrates.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 6:37 pm**

"99% of quotes you read on the internet are fake"

Abraham Lincoln 1864

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 7:51 pm**

mealdeal wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 6:06 pm
Any money, you’re a bigger prick than he was mate

Sticks and stones and all that.
Some of you lot are hilarious.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 8:06 pm**

2 Bee Holed wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:54 pm
My pet hate at the moment is being called 'mate'.

If I don't know somebody's name I call them Sir or young man.

I bite their ear off if they call me mate.
' not a problem', well actually it is a f**king problem, otherwise I wouldn't be bringing it to your attention, you condescending p**ck. I think I took him by surprise.

My manners suddenly left me.

I totally agree. I hate being called mate as well so I would never call anybody I don’t know “mate”. I call them pal instead which is far more respectful.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 8:12 pm**

I think this dictionary definition is quite good ..

"Due regard for the feelings, wishes, or rights of others."

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 8:15 pm**

2 Bee Holed wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:49 pm
You were taught never to answer a policeman, teacher or anyone in authority back.

Unfortunately it’s that sort of unquestioned ‘respect’ that led to horrendous abuses in the past. Authority should be questioned.

They’ve tried really hard in aviation and medicine to end the culture of not speaking out or not questioning your elders or supposed superiors.

As for kids today, they’re great. Thoughtful, kind, generous.. there’s little s***s too, but I remember just as many of those 30 years ago too.

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 9:01 pm**

2 Bee Holed wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 1:49 pm

Respect your elders, listen to them and learn from them.

I could go on. It is all taught from an early age.

I'm sorry, but no. Respect should be earned and living to be old isn't enough alone to earn respect.

I've met plenty of 'old' people I have no respect for (and plenty who I do) and certainly wouldn't want to learn from them, unless the lesson is "how not to be a tw@t".

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 9:20 pm**

Be kind and polite, and the world will be right

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 9:30 pm**

Funny, isn't it?
I'm 70 and I would consider it a bit of an insult if anyone on public transport offered me their seat.
I'm perfectly capable of standing up, thanks

Posted: **Sun Sep 11, 2022 9:30 pm**

TheFamilyCat wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 9:01 pm
I'm sorry, but no. Respect should be earned and living to be old isn't enough alone to earn respect.

No, respect should be the default position.
You read or hear "respect must be earned" quite often, but I have never encountered people in my day to day life that live by this motto

Posted: **Mon Sep 12, 2022 1:04 am**

Damo wrote: ↑
Sun Sep 11, 2022 9:30 pm
No, respect should be the default position.
You read or hear "respect must be earned" quite often, but I have never encountered people in my day to day life that live by this motto

I agree I think respect should be lost by the actions of an individual but given in the first instance.

Posted: **Mon Sep 12, 2022 6:32 am**

Common decency and respect should be the default between two people unless there's a good reason. Obviously you wouldn't be showing Gary Glitter respect if you met him.

What some people expect is not respect but deference, which is very different. Also, living until a certain age doesn't automatically elevate you above people who, though pure accident of birth, have been on the planet for less time. You character, actions, and how you treat people are what define you.

Posted: **Mon Sep 12, 2022 9:51 am**

davideyresleftear wrote: ↑
Mon Sep 12, 2022 6:32 am
Common decency and respect should be the default between two people unless there's a good reason. Obviously you wouldn't be showing Gary Glitter respect if you met him.

What some people expect is not respect but deference, which is very different. Also, living until a certain age doesn't automatically elevate you above people who, though pure accident of birth, have been on the planet for less time. You character, actions, and how you treat people are what define you.

Agree, I think respect and deference are two totally different things. We seem to have lost a default stance of respect for institutions, science and facts but gained a deference for the opinions of mavericks like Trump, Johnson, Farage and social media influencers.

I suppose the question is whether institutions and expertise has fallen into such disrepute for good reason or otherwise.

Posted: **Mon Sep 12, 2022 10:21 am**

We are now living in a world where people think it evolves around themselves.

A world of intolerance and ignorance where self-entitlement rules the way people act.

Too many people live their lives by 'knowing their rights' and 'whats in it for me' type view of the world.

I also find too many people can't exist unless their is a drama going on as it appears to give them happiness in the fact that it's something to do and get angry at.

Because of people wanting to self project how they live onto others in the expectation that everyone should live by the principles, codes and ethics - we find that respect means very little these days.

We see it all the time - even examples on this thread of it.

Posted: **Mon Sep 12, 2022 10:22 am**

clarethomer wrote: ↑
Mon Sep 12, 2022 10:21 am
We are now living in a world where people think it evolves around themselves.

A world of intolerance and ignorance where self-entitlement rules the way people act.

Too many people live their lives by 'knowing their rights' and 'whats in it for me' type view of the world.

I also find too many people can't exist unless their is a drama going on as it appears to give them happiness in the fact that it's something to do and get angry at.

Because of people wanting to self project how they live onto others in the expectation that everyone should live by the principles, codes and ethics - we find that respect means very little these days.

We see it all the time - even examples on this thread of it.

It’s been like that for 40 plus years.

What actually constitutes “respect” ?

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