Daily Mail's Front Page, Friday 24th March, 2017

Imploding Turtle · Post by **Imploding Turtle** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 1:51 am

Quick, everyone hate Google!

It's kind of amazing that the journalists at the Mail felt like they needed to use google to find out how to run people over.

Chester Perry · Post by **Chester Perry** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 2:21 am

wow - not read beyond the headline but ffs!!!!! - and I thought we took a driving test so we knew how to drive safely and not cause mass murder - surely you don't have to google how to drive dangerously, just do the opposite of what the highway code tells you - kids all over the country do this every night for a buzz apparently - it is amazing how many people don't realise how dangerous a car is, the law is responsible in some ways, willful dangerous driving, DUI of both alcohol and/or drugs that cause injury or death should be charge and sentenced as manslaughter offences simply because there will always be pedestrians or other road users. It would certainly make people more aware of the dangers they pose to others.

ClaretAndJew · Post by **ClaretAndJew** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 3:09 am

Sorry but you don't need Google to learn how to use something for a bad reason.

Just like how I know, without using Google, that I could set someone on fire with petrol.

Damo · Post by **Damo** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 3:24 am

Like the criminal masterminds who carry out these attacks need any help with things like 'driving like a bell end'

Imploding Turtle · Post by **Imploding Turtle** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 3:39 am

ClaretAndJew wrote:Sorry but you don't need Google to learn how to use something for a bad reason.

Just like how I know, without using Google, that I could set someone on fire with petrol.

Texaco, the arsonists friend...

Chobulous · Post by **Chobulous** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 7:12 am

Damo wrote:Like the criminal masterminds who carry out these attacks need any help with things like 'driving like a bell end'

Just buy an Audi

morpheus2 · Post by **morpheus2** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 7:17 am

This should keep our intelligence services busy and distracted as hundreds of thousands of peeps google search "how do I become a Muslim terrorist using a car for Jihad to murder Kuffar for ISIS in the name of Islam Allah-hu-akbar" hitting all those buzzwords.

Personally I believe that all Muslims should have their licences revoked until we can figure out just what the hell is going on.

morpheus2 · Post by **morpheus2** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 7:20 am

Apart from takeaway delivery drivers.

morpheus2 · Post by **morpheus2** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 7:22 am

Damo wrote:Like the criminal masterminds who carry out these attacks need any help with things like 'driving like a bell end'

Yes like they probably do...

john'sroseyspecs · Post by **john'sroseyspecs** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:27 am

Hate crime fail?

claretdom · Post by **claretdom** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:27 am

morpheus2 wrote:

Yes like they probably do...

bluelabrador looks exactly as you would expect

Sidney1st · Post by **Sidney1st** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:31 am

claretdom wrote:bluelabrador looks exactly as you would expect

: likes.jpg (105.33 KiB) Viewed 4980 times

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:32 am

So the "Daily Mail" is pointing out where you can get advice on how to kill people?
Murdering, cowardly ****, if I could get my hands on that rag's editor, I'd do time for him I swear I would, etc etc etc Benny and Co will continue with the mockrage as the day progresses no doubt.

nil_desperandum · Post by **nil_desperandum** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:36 am

Personally I found the google entry on how to use a knife equally interesting.

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:42 am

Another crass and embarrassing effort from the "Mail" and I'm assuming their owner(s) must have some kind of vendetta against Google for that rubbish to appear.
Either way, with victims still dying or fighting for their lives, this insensitivity is simply not on.

kentonclaret · Post by **kentonclaret** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:44 am

Fast forward a couple of months and the headline will read "THERESA MAY BANS GOOGLE".

"ANOTHER VICTORY FOR THE DAILY MAIL"

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:53 am

I'm curious about the manual's content.
Step one Get in car.
Step two. Fasten seatbelt.
Step three Start engine
Step four Check rear view mirror and side mirrors.
Step five Drive.

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:55 am

morpheus2 wrote:Apart from takeaway delivery drivers.

and taxi drivers

Imploding Turtle · Post by **Imploding Turtle** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:55 am

Tomorrow in the Daily Mail:

EXPOSÉ! DM JOURNALIST DRESSED AS A MUSLIM INFILTRATES BSM MOTORING SCHOOL WITH JUST A PROVISIONAL LICENCE AND SOME CASH!!!!!!!
For as little as £20 an hour terrorists can learn how to kill us all with cars!!!

We urge all our readers to look out for suspicious activity and requests, like wanting to learn how to start a car but not how to stop. Or being brown.

Rick_Muller · Post by **Rick_Muller** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:57 am

I don't think they're being fair to Microsoft Bing

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:59 am

And in our Weekend Entertainment section we invite you and your family to join us in our sponsored woodland walk where we hope to find as much bear crap as possible.............

Imploding Turtle · Post by **Imploding Turtle** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 9:00 am

Rick_Muller wrote:I don't think they're being fair to Microsoft Bing

5 minutes on Bing would make anyone want to drive a car into crowds of people.

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 9:01 am

Yeah but who will ever forget "Microsoft White "Christmas" ?

Rick_Muller · Post by **Rick_Muller** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 9:10 am

evensteadiereddie wrote:Yeah but who will ever forget "Microsoft White "Christmas" ?

https://youtu.be/3eDkQEhXqtY" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 9:11 am

morpheus2 wrote:

Yes like they probably do...

Was this taken at an Orange Day Parade ? The lad seems to have " concentrated" on something.

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 9:18 am

A spokesman for the Provisional IRA spoke of his dismay at the recent escalation of mistrust and hatred.

"We at the Independent Ribena Association renounce all violence from now on as we work towards a peaceful settlement offered by the Good Friday and Easter Egg agreement.

minnieclaret · Post by **minnieclaret** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 9:34 am

Without a doubt the scummiest of Britain's **** press.

Guich · Post by **Guich** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 9:53 am

Aren't they just spinning out the story that 'Google allows terrorists to advertise on their sites' for another few days, with a world class piece of investigative Googling?
Typically crass of a **** paper to make capital out of a tragedy. But the Mail is never on its own in that.

Bertiebeehead · Post by **Bertiebeehead** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 11:56 am

I wonder if he hates all juice or just foreign juice.

ClaretEngineer · Post by **ClaretEngineer** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 12:01 pm

I'm surprised that none of resident grammatical analysts hasn't picked up on his grammar.

I can't tell whether he is proclaiming death to all juices or if he's advertising his latest drinkable, flavoured poison.

CnBtruntru · Post by **CnBtruntru** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 12:53 pm

I am surprised it took them 2 minutes, must have slow internet or only use two fingers to type with, the guy with the sign with "juice" on it was trying to be politically correct or possibly dyslexic so leave him alone, poor lad.

Bacchus · Post by **Bacchus** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 12:58 pm

Of course, the appropriate response from Google would be to stop taking the Daily Mail's paid search money and start showing all Daily Mail search results on about page 12. Barely a dent in Google's revenues but would decimate the Mail.

wilks_bfc · Post by **wilks_bfc** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 6:40 pm

This has just appeared on my TL, complete with picture of highlighted areas, which I have cropped out

The paper readers of the **** go to appear more "intelligent"

Imploding Turtle · Post by **Imploding Turtle** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 7:28 pm

Bacchus wrote:Of course, the appropriate response from Google would be to stop taking the Daily Mail's paid search money and start showing all Daily Mail search results on about page 12. Barely a dent in Google's revenues but would decimate the Mail.

They can definitely justify refusing to take their ad money, or refuse to serve their websites with ads. But inhibiting their search listings purely because they don't like what they wrote about them could genuinely kill Google, and it should.

Rowls · Post by **Rowls** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 7:42 pm

Not had a good ol' Daily Mail thread for ages.

Classic.

Bacchus · Post by **Bacchus** » Fri Mar 24, 2017 8:50 pm

Imploding Turtle wrote:They can definitely justify refusing to take their ad money, or refuse to serve their websites with ads. But inhibiting their search listings purely because they don't like what they wrote about them could genuinely kill Google, and it should.

Of course. It was a slightly flippant remark rather than a serious proposal. When your revenue stream is almost entirely based on Web traffic Google is certainly not a good enemy to make though.

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Sat Mar 25, 2017 9:48 am

Rowls wrote:Not had a good ol' Daily Mail thread for ages.

Classic.

It is, even by their miserable standards. "Private Eye" would have to work hard to make the paper look as stupid as this.

lakesclaret · Post by **lakesclaret** » Sat Mar 25, 2017 10:43 am

Makes you wonder what the frothing lefties would do without the DM ?They genuinely seem obsessed with consulting the august organ on all world matters then openly seething and foaming at the obvious headline grabbing knee jerk nonsense which they peddle.

The likes of the Star ( can't believe it's still going) The Express ,the Sun and the Mirror are all equally as bad .

Not forgetting the unbiased hard facts and nowt but the truth peddled by the Grun...

evensteadiereddie · Post by **evensteadiereddie** » Sat Mar 25, 2017 10:49 am

Ooooops, those "frothing lefties" seem to have struck a nerve. You say they're obsessed with the paper, rowls reckons we haven't had a "Mail" thread for ages. Make your minds up, kids.

lakesclaret · Post by **lakesclaret** » Sat Mar 25, 2017 11:02 am

Eddie ,surely any self respecting leftie would admit to the chief bogeyman status of the DM? they seem unable to function without it,while it's not quite Bernard Manning it certainly equals or even exceeds Clarkson on the " seethometer"

boiledclaret · Post by **boiledclaret** » Sat Mar 25, 2017 11:31 am

They try to take away more and more of our freedom by protecting a scaremongered society to the point that we're all children.

The Daily Mail can go **** itself.