Beat the Edinburgh Fringe Perrier Award

[Pstotto]

UuuuuuuUUUUUUUUUUUUuuuuuu... uuuuuuuUUUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuuu....UUUUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuu.... UUUUUUUUuuuuuuu...

Always babies skriking outside...

"No... Those are cars, it's traffic, it's called the Dopple Effect,"

[Pstotto]

UuuuuuuuuUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuu.... uuuuuuuUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuu...

If I meditate and think of nicer things, the next rung of hell is babies crying on an aeroplane.

[Pstotto]

Not just speedy boarding zimmer speed but how about planes for children under two only with adults and they can have a flight they all deserve... Or perhaps not and that crying baby might save a drama as much as cause one.

[Pstotto]

Where's Vicky Derbyshire?

[Pstotto]

Weber Model Rules in The Rhur... Dusseldorf have been told to keep the Neuss down.

[Aclaret]

Where's Vicky Derbyshire?

Buxton ?

[Pstotto]

Thruxton.

I took my dying cat to the vet and in the vets they said they had a cat translator and it mewed and the app. said the cat said Pstotto if there's one advice I can give to you, it's keep off catnip.

[Pstotto]

..."And take it easy between licking your fur and the spikes on your spike."

I've just bought a pet lizard as a replacement...

[Massivefloodlights]

We have a new winner:

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-ed ... 569215.amp

Lorna Rose Treen was voted winner of the annual competition with: “I started dating a zookeeper, but it turned out he was a cheetah.”

[yTib]

who were the judges? a couple of nine year olds?

[ŽižkovClaret]

who were the judges? a couple of nine year olds?

I mean, the one liners have to be something they can share in the day time for it to serve the sponsor purposes. It can influence the picks lol

The overall award shortlist is more relevant. Phil Ellis's show for one was funny as f**k. (Full disclosure, he is a mate, but its funny regardless)

[yTib]

i prefer this one from 2019:

"I keep randomly shouting out 'broccoli' and 'cauliflower' - I think I might have florets."

-olaf falafel.

[AlargeClaret]

We have a new winner:

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-ed ... 569215.amp

Lorna Rose Treen was voted winner of the annual competition with: “I started dating a zookeeper, but it turned out he was a cheetah.”

Jesus wept , can’t beat these edgy comedians

[HahaYeah]

Jokes can't be edgy nowadays, mustn't cause offence.